


Something Unreachable

by Zhama



Category: Danganronpa
Genre: Angst, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Author is slow, Character Study, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Future Foundation (Dangan Ronpa), Fuyupeko, Hinakoma - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Junko is mentioned, Komahina - Freeform, M/M, Masaru - Freeform, Mission Fic, Misunderstandings, Nagito Komaeda centeric, No Smut, OC's - Freeform, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post DR3, Post-Canon, Rescue Missions, Traveling, WOH, all of the dr2 cas is mentioned, dark themes, hajime is confused, i shall make nagito suffer for no reason, jataro, kotoko - Freeform, makoto naegi - Freeform, mild tokomaru, nagisa - Freeform, nagito is clueless, nagito is sleep deprived, warriors of hope - Freeform, you guys can interepert byakuya makoto and kyokos relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:22:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 28,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27417226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zhama/pseuds/Zhama
Summary: After the events of Danganronpa 3, everything seems to be going well. However Hajime notices that Nagito has been acting strange and comfronts him."So you don't remember?"After the confrontation Nagito leaves the island all alone to understand himself and what hope even means anymore.
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito
Comments: 58
Kudos: 199





	1. You don't remember?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! It's the end of 2020 and im writing a Komahina fanfiction for the first time!  
> I don't have any plans on when this will be finished or where i am going with this exactly so it will be a journey for both me and Nagito haha.  
> Also i am new at writing...anything really!

"He is chillin' on the beach dude," motioned the pink haired mechanic while looking quite gloomy. "I wouldn't talk to him right now tho, he didn't even say anything about my new baby!" He was shaking the robot in his hand towards Hajime, almost hitting him with it out of anger.

Hajime was quite amused that Kazuichi wanted some comfort from Nagito, the guy had creeped him out for quite a long while after all. He always seemed to be hating the guy but it seemed like he was showing some effort to get along with him. The thought made Hajime smile while Kazuichi took out some tools to angrily mess with the toy in his hands.

Hajime noted that the toy looked awfully like a rabbit version of Sonia. It was rather cute but definitely needed some design changes.

Gundham and Kazuichi were in a competition to give Sonia the best gift for her upcoming birthday and that's why Kazuichi seemed to need some second opinions about his gift.

Kazuichi stopped momentarily and looked at Hajime, "Why are you searching for him anyway? I don't think he is up to something...wait maybe he is! Is that why you two fought this morning?!" 

Hajime flinched as he was reminded of that morning.

-

When he had arrived at the restaurant, it was quite loud and lively. Ibuki shoving some food in a very angry Fuyuhiko's mouth, Hiyoko laughing and taking pictures of Fuyuhiko with Mahiru's camera, Akane and Nekomaru bothering a stressed looking Mikan to run some laps with them while Mitarai and Teruteru were trying to stop Imposter from "sampling" the breakfast, warning him about the shortage. It was chaotic. And loud. Very loud. As soon as Hajime stepped foot in the room, he wanted to go back to his cottage and sleep until they calmed down. He would have done that if he didn't see a very odd looking Nagito in the corner of the room, clenching a glass of water.

He knew that Nagito hated loud places but when he was with them he never seemed to mind it. Actually he seemed to enjoy watching the former ultimates interact with each other. 

Sensing the other's stress, not really thinking about anything else Hajime walked up to Nagito. Successfully avoiding a crash swiftly from a running Ibuki who was getting chased after by Fuyuhiko with a spoon in his hand. 

As he was getting closer he noticed the bags under Nagito's eyes, informing him that he hadn't slept the night before. Hajime deduced a nightmare was very likely. All of them had nightmares including himself. So he decided he should be careful with his words.

As he reached the table Nagito was sitting at he heard a very high pitched scream and a sound of a crash behind him. The high pitched scream indicated Ibuki had crashed into Kazuichi, who just entered the room. He heard a "Got ya!!" as well but his attention was caught by Nagito looking up at him. He looked angry but his expression changed to a carefree smile in the blink of an eye. The change was disturbingly fast and it put Hajime on guard.

"Good morning Hajime!" chimed Nagito, offering a what *seemed* to be a warm smile. "Morning, did you get to eat anything?" Hajime asked, trying to start a conversation. He already knew he hadn't eaten anything yet. "If you didn't we can get breakfast together."

"That is very kind of you, offering to eat with trash like me. Although I guess I can say you are not that different anyway." Nagito spat out with a smile. -Great, we are starting with some insults. - Hajime thought.

"You don't have to eat with me if you don't want to. I'm gonna go get something." He muttered as he turned his back towards him and started walking towards Teruteru. He already felt tired and he woke up like 15 minutes ago.

It seemed like the dispute between the trio had been taken care of as Mitarai and Imposter seemed to be having a friendly conversation while eating their breakfast together with Mikan.

He walked to where Teruteru had prepared some light breakfast for everyone. "Good morning." He exhaled a little loudly so Teruteru could hear him over the sounds of his friends. It seemed like it was Fuyuhiko's turn to shove some food into Ibuki's mouth now.

Teruteru was grabbing his own plate when he heard him and as soon as he saw Hajime he smiled pleasantly. "Ooh good morning my dear Hajime! How are you feelin'?"

"Tired." Hajime sighed a little exaggeratedly as he got two plates. "Did the future foundation not send enough food this time?" While he was thankful they would send them anything at all he also wished they would send more stuff sometimes. He knew they weren't well liked...anywhere at all really… but it didn't mean he wasn't going to get a little frustrated with the future foundation as the former ultimate’s were the reason they were still up and running. 

Teruteru sighed that almost matched his own "Mmhm. I just wish they would send some different ingredients sometimes y'know. I'm gonna have to invent some new recipes at this rate!" Hajime chuckled. "I'll tell Makoto about it for the next shipment. New supplies are on the way and they will arrive tomorrow so you might have to wait a while" At this Teruteru's eyes seemed to shimmer. "Oh bless your soul Hajime! Your efforts are always appreciated~" he chirped.

As him and Teruteru parted ways Hajime noticed he was feeling better.

When he got to their table he noticed Nagito looking intently at the plates in his hands.

Before he even got a chance to put the plates on the table Nagito muttered

"I already ate."

_-_ **He is a bad liar** _-_

"Is that so?" hummed Hajime, unable to hide his sarcasm as he put the plates down. "You don't have to do stuff for me Hajime. I hardly deserve it." Exclaimed Nagito without missing a beat. "Is it wrong, wanting to do something for my friend?" Hajime spoke calmly as he sat down.

"Friend?" Nagito whispered, seeming mostly to himself and after some silence he started to snicker. 

Hajime stopped. He immediately tried searching Nagito's eyes but he was looking at his hands, head low, his messy hair covering his eyes. Nagito didn’t have that many breakdowns now but he couldn’t be too sure.

Despite the lovely atmosphere and his friends talking in the background his hands felt a little chilly, looking at the boy in front of him who felt like would crumble at any second.

And that feeling changed completely when Nagito looked him straight in the eyes. His eyes looked unfocused and the sun hitting him just right made his eye bags look more apparent. He had a smile that didn't reach his eyes. He tilted his head a little.

"Friend?" He said more loudly this time.

"Before all of this started none of you liked me, when the despair happened none of you liked me, when we were in the killing game none of you liked me. Of course you guys were right to not like someone like me, but suddenly calling me your friend is a little weird don't you think?"

Hajime felt himself frown. He was trying to gather his thoughts to counter it but Nagito spoke faster.

"You didn't even want to give me food when I was tied up and hungry for days, and now you get me breakfast out of nowhere because we are friends?" Nagito laughed bitterly at the end of his sentence.

Hajime felt guilt consume him. He knew he didn't treat Nagito right, but at the time he didn't know anything. About himself, about Nagito or their friends. About that world. He was just cautious... at least that's what he wanted to believe.

"We all went through the same despair, we all survived together and we are hanging onto everything together. We are friends Nagito." 

"Oh but not all of us survived, did we?"

Nagito spat knowing full well he was opening a closed wound.

Hajime hit the table, closing his eyes shut so he didn't have to see Nagito's wicked smile grow wider. 

"If you have something to say to me, just say it instead of trying to get under my skin." Hajime breathed, calming himself down.

He heard the chair scraping against the floor and Nagito getting up. Hajime instinctively looked to where he was and saw Nagito looking down at him with an expressionless face and say

"I have nothing to say to a pathetic lab rat like you."

-

Hajime sighed "No he isn't planning on doing anything...I think". Kazuichi started scratching his head with the tool he was holding. "Hm I don't know dude. He looked really deep in thought. I can never tell what is goin' on in his head." Hajime silently nodded. He could sort of deduce some stuff but it was never really %100 clear with Nagito. Maybe that’s why the memories he has of as Izuru are mostly with Nagito. Izuru was probably curious about him to some extent. At least to let him tag along to places he went and some...stuff… he didn't really remember everything and he didn't even know why. Maybe Izuru just blocked those memories.

"Weel-p" he said with a popping "p". "I'm gonna go show this to Mahiru! She is a girl so she would now more about what Miss Sonia would like! Bye!" Kazuichi waved as he ran back to the cottages.

As Hajime was walking towards the beach he was trying to think what he should say. He didn't want to apologize because that was stupid. He wanted to know what made Nagito act the way he did but he didn't really know how to get to that point. Since everyone woke up their relationship was good and stable. Nagito even gave him some gifts which made Hajime way too happy than he would like to admit.

Nagito started giving him gifts after their mission to take the fall for Future Foundation. Like the colorful bracelet he was wearing right now. He was the one who gave gifts to others so being on the receiving end was such a good feeling. 

He spent some time alone with him as well. They sometimes just read some books in the library together, did some gardening together or tried to explore the island more. The island was way more different than the simulation. The layout was similar but that was about it. He explored the simulation Jabberwock mostly alone so exploring with Nagito was way more fun in his opinion. Nagito was sharp so he noticed some stuff Hajime didn't even think would be important.

They also found some animals which somehow were still on the island without harm. Gundham was thrilled about the sheep the most.

It was weird, Hajime thought they were getting closer. He even saw Nagito make a really cute face once and it kept popping up on his mind in the most random times. Just like now.

The usual Nagito, whose facial expressions didn't quite change that much has been blushing vigorously when Ibuki yelled Hajime and Peko's name, snapping them away from their conversation. Ibuki was holding onto Nagito's arm in a death grip and pulling him along with her.

"Hajimeeeee!!! Pekoo! You two especially /have/ to see this!!!" She yelled. On Nagito's other side was Sonia who had a bright smile. After the trio got close to them they stopped and made a "Tadaa" motion towards Nagito. 

He was wearing dog ears.

Big fluffy dog ears.

Hajime was baffled to say the least.

"Why is he wearing dog ears? And where did you guys even _find_ dog ears?"

Ibuki puffed up her chest and made her usual weird - **proud?** \- face "Ibuki made them with Sonia!" When Hajime's confused face didn't change Sonia giggled and added, "She has been teaching me how to make homemade accessories and we decided we wanted to make one for everyone! But we have only one right now and wanted to show everyone!" she clapped her hands at the end of her sentence. 

Ah so they forced Nagito to be their model. Well knowing Nagito he probably wasn't forced.

Hajime glanced back at Nagito's head to get a good look. The ears were really light blonde colored, definitely handmade and a little asymmetrical, they looked fluffy enough though. They were probably made for Sonia but seemed to fit Nagito better, cute.

Wait, huh?? Nagito and cute in the same sentence?? That feels wrong but…it’s… correct??

As Hajime was having an internal conflict Peko got closer to Nagito. When Hajime got out of his head he noticed Peko looking quite stiff while asking "Can I um…can I pet you?"

The question immediately got Ibuki squealing like a school girl and she pushed Nagito a little. "A-ah, sure." Said Nagito seeming to get slightly more embarrassed. He had to bend down a little since he was taller than Peko, his hair shielding his face. Peko's hands trembled a little as she reached towards Nagito's fluffy head. Once they made contact her eyes seemed to sparkle. "It's so much softer than I thought" she mumbled under her breath. She started petting him with more confidence and Hajime noticed it was Nagito's time to tremble a little.

He wanted to see his face so badly.

When Peko stopped petting Nagito she had the most content smile he had ever seen on her face.

His hair couldn’t be _that_ satisfying to the touch.

Sonia giggled behind Nagito "Well Hajime, aren't you going to pet him too?"

She was probably joking with the way her voice sounded so he just wanted to make a sarcastic remark and leave but after she said that Nagito lifted his head a little and they made eye contact. Whatever he wanted to say vanished in a second when he saw Nagito looking at him with red cheeks behind his bangs.

"O-oh, ok." Stuttered Hajime and Nagito lifted his head more.

Since Hajime was taller than Peko he didn't need to bend down as much and because of that Nagito was looking straight at him. It was a little nerve wracking and he knew if he delayed he would chicken out so he put both of his hands on Nagito's head without thinking. 

"Oh it's actually soft. "Hajime whispered to himself without thinking and this time Nagito laughed. He heard him. Damn.

He didn't want to focus on the feeling the laughing left with him so he started running his hands through his hair and the homemade dog ears. His hair was surprisingly soft to run his fingers through but it was tangled because of Peko's little intense petting so without really thinking Hajime started to untangle them. If he wasn't so focused on untangling his hair, he could have noticed the blush that had consumed Nagito's entire face and the giggling of the three girls around him.

That Nagito and this morning Nagito felt like he wasn't even the same person.

Hajime sighed as he was walking towards the beach. The sun would go down in exactly 15 minutes so he hoped he could find Nagito before that. Today was exhausting and he wanted to sleep as soon as possible. He got dragged in a train fight with Akane and Nekomaru after all.

"There he is."

He found him sitting on the beach by himself, seemingly watching the sea. Hajime took a deep breath and walked towards him. He wasn't angry with him. He got hurt sure but he wasn't angry. All of them had their down days, it wasn't easy to stay all positive when the ghost of their past would always hunt them after all. It was easier to do it together though. All of them knew that. So he walked up to him to talk, or just hang out in silence, to let him know he wasn't alone.

When he got closer to him he noticed he wasn't looking at the sea at all. He was looking at this prosthetic arm that Hajime and Kazuichi worked together to build. The arm however wasn't attached to him, it was on the sand, in front of him.

"Hey." Said Hajime softly making him notice his arrival. He didn't expect an answer so he just sat down next to him, a little farther away then he would normally do.

"...hey." whispered Nagito. If Hajime's hearing wasn't good he wouldn't even notice he said anything.

They sat in silence for a minute. The distant seagulls singing and the water slowly rocking back and forth was the only sound.

"Why did you take it off?" questioned Hajime, referring to the prosthetic in front of them. "...It didn't feel right wearing such a wonderful gift after saying those things." 

"I am... sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. "Hearing those things from Nagito's mouth was refreshing. Hajime felt lighter now.

It's been a while since they got out of the NeoWorld Program and they had to work on so many things. Some together and some alone. They all matured and healed at least a little bit. Mikan had decided to cut her hair completely and let it grow again, without the hints of her past abuse. Imposter wore the clothes Mitarai picked for him, instead of always dressing like the person he was impersonating. Kazuichi stopped seeing Sonia as the perfect princess and treated her like a friend. Hiyoko was careful to not insult anyone's insecurities. They were all making progress. Some slower than others but they were moving towards the future they created, together.

Hajime felt Nagito looking at him and he shrugged with a little smile on his face "Its fine. I am also sorry about the things I said before.”

The staring didn't stop so he turned to his left to look at him. Nagito was resting his head on his knees looking at him with glassy eyes. He had a curious but peaceful look on his face, the sunset making his hair and face look graceful while the little breeze gave him a fuzzy feeling.

"I don't understand you Hajime." He said softly.

"Huh?"

 _He_ was the one who didn't understand _him_? That was his line!

"You are always so kind to me and sometimes its unbearable."

And now he was confused even more. "Me being kind to you is...bad?"

He looked back at the arm. "I didn't mean it like that. It just...makes me hope for something that's unreachable." "Something unreachable?" Hajime repeated since he didn't really know what to say. Nagito didn't say anything back so Hajime turned his attention back to the sea. The other side of the sea, society felt pretty unreachable, especially to them right? Did he want to go back to his school days? It was impossible now, after everything they had done.

While he was thinking Nagito had gotten closer. “You should know, I already told you." Nagito stated, catching his attention. He noticed they were knee to knee now. Nagito’s white eyelashes glimmered in the sunsets orange hue, with his eyelids relaxed he somehow managed to intimidate him.

Hajime gulped. Ugh there he goes again, instead of giving him the answers, he wants Hajime to get to it himself. 

So he already told him what he wants? It could be anything though they talked about a lot of stuff!

Nagito was looking at him expectedly.

He saw the prosthetic arm at the corner of his eyes. He got nervous so instead of answering him he got up, got the hand that was sitting on the sand and sat next to him again. Closer than he needed to be.

“You know, you uh… shouldn't put this here, sand could get in and ah… you would have trouble moving it." He blurted, trying to clear his thoughts. Nagito just hummed. "Here, let me put it on." He said as he reached towards Nagito's left hand. Nagito seemed unimpressed but still complied.

Hajime knew he didn't need help putting on his prosthetic arm anymore but he just didn't want to admit he had no idea what Nagito was talking about. As the hand clicked into place Nagito pulled his arm towards himself, pulling Hajime closer with it. The sudden closeness making his heart skyrocket in an instant.

"So you don't remember?" He questioned, with a breathy voice, searching his eyes, his prosthetic on his shoulder, despite it being cold somehow burning him through his clothes. Hajime didn't look at his eyes though; his eyes were glued to his lips immediately. They were plump from biting and warm looking in the sunset, they were so close. Too close for comfort. The sound of the beach was silent.

If he closed the distance they could-

That thought stopped as Nagito sighed very loudly. The air of cold breath hitting him made Hajime jump a little and Nagito moved away from him.

The sun had set and with it Nagito stood up. "Well if you don't remember I guess it wasn't important. See you later Hajime."

He had no idea of what to say. Maybe something like “Wait! What do you mean?!” but his voice had died in his throat.

Hajime watched his jacket swing as Nagito walked further and further away.


	2. Sun Always Rises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is going to be a dream sequence with Junko and some blood so be warned!

"Haha well this blows" Nagito thought out loud as he flung himself to his bed.

He didn't expect Hajime to forget about his confession. Sure it has been almost a year and Nagito was too unsure to say anything about it again, considering the stuff that had happened, but he hoped at least Hajime would reject him so he would stop feeling like this towards him.

He knew that was impossible though. 

Even when he knew Hajime was still in love with Chiaki.

"Well at least he doesn't have to feel like I’m an annoyance I guess." he sighed to his pillows.

He was feeling weirdly comfortable even though he hadn’t taken off his jacket or anything. 

And he drifted to sleep just like that.

Chains.

Chains that he put on himself willingly.

And a hand with red nails pulling them.

It should have felt suffocating but instead it was a welcome gesture.

She was laughing. And it felt like scratches in his head.

He remembered what his mother told him.

“Always smile! Even if things are bad. If you smile everything will be ok!”

So he was smiling.

He loved her.

He hated her.

He wanted to see her shine.

He wanted to kill her with his own hands.

"Oh what bold lines coming from a failure of a human being."

She grinned down at him.

He smiled.

"Oh my bad, I meant trash."

His smile grew wider.

He loved her.

He hated her with all of his being.

His chains fell to the ground.

She was gone, and her hand was on the ground, still holding the chains.

He cried.

He wanted her back.

He needed to kill her himself.

He took her hand, trying to pull his chains with it.

It was futile, he couldn't move it even though it was attached to him now.

He laughed and laughed into the void.

There were people around him.

His former classmates. Telling him to "Do this! Do that!"

He gladly did everything they told him.

They forgot his name so he told them.

He was Servant.

And they were despair.

They stood there, fighting among themselves for him, well more for his service and his Luck.

He was happy anyway.

He heard confident footsteps.

And he felt his chains being grabbed, slowly leading him away.

The fighting had stopped.

They were silently looking at him.

He just followed the person with long black hair out of the room.

He loved him.

He hated him.

He was The Ultimate Hope!

He was a fake.

He had fallen into despair just like them.

How pathetic.

He hated him.

Even when blood red eyes bored into him, soft but a sturdy hand caressing his cheeks, he hated him.

But he loved him.

So much.

And it was almost tearing him apart.

"You are boring. Everything about you is boring to me."

He laughed.

It hurt.

The chains fell down again.

He was alone this time.

And then he wasn't.

"Aww you're so sad! No one is here to love you!"

She was standing in front of him, missing her left hand and her right eye, her stomach was cut open, bleeding from the missing pieces.

She didn't seem to mind it.

"But you always knew that didn't you? No one will ever love you, even though that’s the only thing that you crave! It's unreachable for you."

"Such despair." She lulled.

Her voice echoing in his mind. 

It echoed and echoed.

Like hundreds of cockroaches walking on walls that were closing on him.

"If only you could die sooner. Too bad he fixed you."

It was hard to breathe. He fell to the ground, hugging his knees, holding his head in his hands. But one hand didn't reach him.

When he looked to his left with shaking breaths he noticed he didn't have his or her hand anymore. It was just pain and blood gushing out.

He did this to himself.

The panic coursing through him was just enough to-

-wake him up. 

Gasping for air, sweat dripped down from his face onto his lap as if it had been raining. He tried to steady his breathing but it was taking too long. He got up and took his jacket off. With a trembling and sweaty hand, he opened his windows. It was a little easier to breathe but not enough. His metallic hand was too cold and uncomfortable so he took it off clumsily. 

He walked to the bathroom to wash his face. 

Once the cold water made contact with his skin he was able to breathe more easily.

Breathe in, breathe out.

He looked at himself in the mirror, dark eye bags clear in the white lighting of the bathroom. Skin pale, more than normally, making him look like a ghost. 

His hair was getting longer, almost past his shoulders. On a whim he took the scissors from the drawer underneath the sink, and started cutting his hair. 

The last time it was this long, Akane wanted to cut his hair even when he said it was fine. She was surprisingly skilled with the scissors, saying something about siblings with a sad look in her eyes. When she was finished she was proud of the way his hair looked.

This time though with the way Nagito was cutting it, it was bound to look choppy. He was cutting with one hand, and it was really difficult. He didn't care about how his hair would turn out. He didn't like the way he looked anyway so it was fine for him.

When he was done, it was shorter than he ever had since childhood. It was still long for a guy, longer than Hajime's and Fuyuhiko's, but it was comfortable now.

He tried to get a better look at himself. 

Now that his hair was shorter his neck bruise was more clear to look at. The bruise had healed long ago but the chain still had left some marks here and there, from the abuse of 2 years on his fragile neck.

He was not the same. He didn't have her hand anymore. He wasn't chained down for despair. He wasn't using others. And no one was using him. He was free to do whatever he wanted.

Because of the adrenaline rush from the nightmare, he was thinking too fast.

Wasn't today the day the supply ship would go back to mainland?

Hmm.

What was keeping him here? 

The hope he has been searching his entire life, was it here?

He wasn't sure.

Logically thinking the brightest hope would come from the darkest despair.

This island and his classmates hope was different from what he was looking for. Wasn’t it?

What was the hope he was searching for now? Did he even need to think like this now?

He didn't need to search desperately for it any longer did he?

His illness was cured by Izuru. Just to test himself, not because he cared for Nagito, right? Because he kept bothering him to challenge their lucks, must have been annoying. Not for him though, he loved challenging Izuru's luck.

He didn't need to rush. He was going to live.

He was going to _live_.

He could go out to search what he was looking for.

They all went to mainland for mission purposes anyway. It was fine.

He never went out though, because of his health conditions. He had asked to assist with some of the missions but Hajime would always decline them. It was ok now since he recovered right?

It was fine. But why was he feeling anxious? He wondered, clicking his hand into place while gathering some necessities and putting them into his backpack. He rarely felt like this.

He stopped and checked the time, 4:49.

Huh, he actually got to sleep this time, or his clock was broken again. He couldn't tell which one it was so once he deemed he was ready he put on his now dry but slightly smelly coat back on and opened his cottage door. Can he even find somewhere to wash his jacket? He hoped so. He didn’t like smelling bad but he could bear it.

The breeze didn't hit him hard since he had opened his window to let fresh morning air in earlier. But it was still slightly cold for him making him remember he would get sick pretty easily in cold weather so he needed to be more careful. He was wearing a long sleeved shirt inside his closed coat but still. It would be pretty unlucky if he died from cold while he was all alone.

Not minding the cold, he breathed in the morning air and started walking towards the shore.

He didn't pack that much so his back was light. Some snacks, pills and a notebook was good enough. He let the other stuff to his luck. He was lucky after all. This is what he did while he was servant too but he didn’t want to think the similarity of his situation right now.

While he was walking towards where the ship would start sailing he noticed a figure nearby. When he got close to the blonde girl hunched over, he put on a pleasant smile.

"Good morning Hiyoko." He croaked out, not used to talking yet.

"AAH!" the blonde jumped energetically, her voice echoing in the empty area.

"What the- What the _hell_ Nagito?! Do you want to kill me!!??" She yelled angrily at him, holding her right hand over her heart.

"Ah, that wasn't my intention in the slightest. However, I’m sorry for the fright."

She just breathed out a big sigh and snapped her head towards him.

"What are you doing up so early you freak?" She spat out, more curious than insulting. Nagito tilted his head a little while trying to come up with a useless excuse.

"Morning walk?" 

Her left eyebrow shot up. "With a _backpack_?" She questioned, her voice getting back in her normal sarcastic tone. 

When Nagito didn't say anything she looked like she noticed something very important, her eyes wide with mild shock.

"Oh you cut your hair? Why?" She prodded, putting on her curiously innocent face while leaning towards him a little.

"It was a.... spur of the moment decision." He felt a little uncomfortable with the sudden closeness so he turned his face away from her a little.

Her face lighted up mischievously at his answer.

"Did you get your heart broken and cut your hair just like a high school girl? Oh! I know! Is it because your gay feelings got rejected by your not so gay cruuuush?" She cooed.

Well she wasn't off the mark but it still stung, since she already knew he had feelings for Hajime, she apparently thought joking about this was a good idea right now, or she was trying to distract herself with something she found amusing.

"Why aren’t you with Mahiru? Did she kick you out perhaps?" He countered instead. Smiling a little coldly now. He wanted to get out of this conversation and get on the ship already.

She looked too hurt by it for it to not be true so he smiled at her even more, wanting to provoke her so she would stop talking with him already.

"HO-HOW?!THATS- That’s none of your fucking _business_ you piece of- you- UGH!" She raised her hands and for a second Nagito thought she was going to hit him but no, she just flailed her hands around out of frustration. 

Nagito wouldn’t have think she was going to cry but she pointed a middle finger towards him, tears in her eyes and ran in the direction he came from.

Well that settles that.

He sighed exhaustedly. “Sorry.” He breathed out to no one. He noticed something had happened between Mahiru and Hiyoko. They have been avoiding each other as of late. It was kind of mean of him, bullying a girl, but he just wanted to be on his way already. The island was starting to suffocate him.

He managed to get to the ship without running into anyone else. Not like they would care even if they saw him anyway.

Talking to the future foundation members that were responsible with the ship wasn't hard. Just saying Makoto's name was good enough.

Ah, the real Ultimate Hope. He wanted to see him again. The last time he saw him was when he came by to check how they were doing maybe hm- 2 months ago? He wasn't sure. It was really nice of him though. He couldn’t have expected less from the smaller lucky boy. His smile definitely rivaled Hajime's- wait no stop thinking about that. If he spiraled down in that direction, he wouldn’t stop.

Unknowingly he had started thinking about him anyway.

Hajime was average looking –if you put down the fact that he has 2 different colored eyes- but these days he seemed to be getting handsomer and it wasn’t doing it good for Nagito. At all. He wasn’t the same Hajime from the Neo World Program, but he also wasn’t Izuru. There were times where it seemed like he was Izuru, when he needed to use his talents. But there were also silent times he felt different. The way he looked at Nagito made him shiver sometimes and he wasn’t sure if it was the good kind or the bad one.

He sighed as he found one of the few rooms with a bed the ship had. It was really cramped but not like he couldn't fit in. It wouldn't be the worst place he slept in- at all. Even with the metallic sea smell the room had. It was familiar in a distant way.

He didn't like hanging out in the ships deck since the wind could make him sick easily. But he still wanted to see the sunrise. It was beautiful and he hadn't grown tired of watching it reflect on the stuff around him. So he went to the ship's deck. Rather slowly, the event of waking up with a nightmare reminding his body to take it slowly. He yawned when he was in the clear, stretching his arms in the air. He felt like his neck was too exposed so he panicked for a second, he touched his neck with his good hand and felt like an idiot. Right, his hair was short now.

He turned to gawk at the sun's beauty and leaned on the railings with his elbows. It was mesmerizing to him no matter how many times he saw it. 

The sun always rose in the morning and went down in the evening. Life kept continuing around him. He never stopped breathing. It made him feel normal. Like there wasn't a luck cycle controlling his life whether he wanted it to or not.

He leaned on to the railing, closing his eyes and basking in the warmth of the sun that was fighting the cold breeze of the morning. He was cold but he knew in due time the sun would bless him with warmth. But if he stayed under it too much he would get sunburn. He was quite pale after all. Just like how hope could make you feel so safe and despair would just rip it out under you.

He chuckled to himself, finding it hilarious how he tied this to the way he thought of hope and despair. 

The few of the working crewmates side eyed him, looking at the weirdo laughing at himself, probably thinking they shouldn't get too close to him. They all thought that way so it was easy to predict. But it was also boring.

He just noticed that the ship had sailed already while he was too busy basking himself under the warmth of the sunlight. He felt like he forgot to do something.

Hmm, probably should have left a note or something. Leaving without saying anything was rude but oh well, Hiyoko saw him in the morning so they should be able to guess. They weren't stupid.... ok they weren't _too_ stupid.

He couldn't tell what he was feeling now. It was like when he ate too much and needed to take a break for a minute but he didn't eat anything yet. It was like something was blocking his throat but it also felt freeing. 

He figured it was fine. Hajime had said he should try to discover himself.

Having a journey alone would make him accomplish that right?

The sun had already risen so he stopped leaning on the railings and went back inside to try to sleep the ship ride away.


	3. Approval

“Hey, we arrived.”

The man’s voice came after the knocking on the metal door jolted Nagito awake.

Nagito felt on alarm immediately, panicked from the unfamiliar voice and - now that he opened his eyes- unfamiliar place. As he heard the footsteps of the most likely crewmate of the ship go further away, he remembered what was going on.

Oh right, he decided to go on a journey, alone, on a whim.

He let out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding in. He got off the uncomfortable bed, letting the book he was reading fall to the ground, he put it back to its place, got his jacket and shoes back on, took his quite empty bag and left the ship.

They arrived really early. Earlier than he thought actually. Apparently it took 16 hours. Well now that he was thinking about it the cargo ship was small and it was empty aside from some of the works that had been completed by Kazuichi. He also didn’t know how much distance was between the mainland and Jabberwock. He had read about it in one of the brochures back in the day but he didn’t remember it now.

Once he got out he was met with a scenery he didn’t expect.

The place the ship had docked was the place he helped- no… assisted Kazuichi to destroy so the Future Foundation wouldn’t get any cargo.

This place used to be filled to the brim with Monokuma’s. But now it looked like the Future Foundation had done a good job restoring it. Even in the dim lighting of the night he could see that there were still parts of buildings and some rubble here and there but it was in good shape.

The bitterness he was feeling vanished in the blink of an eye with the mention of his name.

“Nagito? What…what are you doing here?”

Ah… that sweet voice. It belonged to none other than the Ultimate Hope. To think he would meet him right now… how lucky.

Makoto was standing at the bottom of the metal bridge connecting the ship and the docking station. Nagito was higher up than Makoto and he slowly descended down the bridge with a genuine smile on his face, his jacket fluttering. When he got closer to Makoto he noticed he was looking worried but he greeted him with his usual demeanor anyway.

“Good evening Sir Naegi.” He breathed politely.

“ _’Sir Naegi’_? Um you are older than me so I don’t think you should call me that.” He said scratching his cheek.

The motion was cute. He was cute. And short. Which made him even cuter.

As he was admiring him he noticed there were three more people behind him. Kyoko Kirigiri, Byakuya Togami and Aoi Asahina. What a pleasure, getting greeted by his underclassmen and his saviors as soon as he stepped out of the ship. They didn’t look as welcoming as Makoto though.

“I don’t think that is the problem we have here is it Makoto?” stated Kyoko, stepping a little closer to him. “Huh? Oh Sorry, right, the problem.” Makoto said a little embarrassed, rubbing his neck, since he seemed like he was the only one not taking this as seriously as… whatever this was.

“Problem? Is something wrong?” Nagito asked, not really catching up on what they were talking about.

“The problem is that _You_ left the island, all alone, without informing us about the why. We have talked about how fragile your class’s situation is correct?” Byakuya butted in, irritated, making everyone look at Nagito.

Huh. How did they find out about this so quickly? He was only gone for 16 hours, would they notice his absence and report it to Byakuya? It seemed like that was the case.

“Ahaha, I’m sorry for anything that I might have caused. It wasn’t my intention to put you guys in a tough situation, really! I was planning on reporting as soon as I came here and well, it seems like I didn’t need to since you guys are already here!” He assured him.

He understood why they were tense now. A remnant of despair leaving their “prison” would put Makoto and his friends in a tough situation since they have convinced their higher ups and the members of Future Foundation that they wouldn’t cause any more problems.

He also noted that it was weird for all four of them to be here. Was it a coincidence or did they came here because of him? He hoped it was just a coincidence. He had no intention of causing them any trouble at all.

“Can we talk about this inside? I’m freezing.” Said Asahina rubbing her forearms with her hands, trying to keep herself warm from the chill of the night.

"Uh sure let's go." Makoto said as he led the others to a nearby 3 story building.

While they were headed to wherever Makoto deemed worthy, Nagito heard people whispering as usual as they moved past them. Some dealing with some cargo and others just talking to each other as they smoke, making the air around them ashy. How did they find cigarettes? he wondered.

**Filth**

**Why is he here?**

**Their fault**

**Should have died**

Nagito was a little surprised even though he knows he shouldn't be. He has heard the others complain about not getting treated right when they were on their missions to _help_ these people but he was still not expecting to be bad mouthed while he was near the survivors of the tragedy and pretty much their bosses. He also got reminded that it's been a while since he was in this kind of situation -thus explaining his surprise.

"This room is fine." Kyoko suddenly exclaimed from behind them, pointing to a door Makoto had passed. 

"Huh? But isn't that-"

"It should suffice." Byakuya cut off Makoto before he could even ask his question and opened the door. "Nice thinking Kyoko. No one will bother us in this room, since it belongs to Munakata." He explained with assurance in his voice.

Upon entering Nagito immediately noticed the big screen that had camera feed on them but none of them had vision inside the rooms, only the corridors and the main entrance.

Huh, strange. Maybe someone had hacked them since there were several black screens. Having a programmer would be quite helpful but for once Nagito noticed voicing that thought might be hurtful to the survivors of the tragedy. Or maybe they felt uncomfortable after their second death game. It involved Future Foundation cameras ultimately.

"So." Kyoko started once Asahina had closed the door. "Why did you run away from the island?" She questioned with a curious look, but the look would have felt threatening to the people who haven't met her before.

"Ah I wouldn't say I 'ran away' but I understand why you guys would think that way." He chuckled nervously even though he knew why this conversation started, where they wanted to take it and how he would lead it away from it.

"So you didn't notify anyone, not your friends or us, and you won't admit that this is running away?" Byakuya added in a mocking tone.

"Well-" he didn't get to finish as Asahina cut him off.

"Your friends are really worried sick y'know?"

"I can assure you guys that I’m not here to cause any problems! Quite the opposite actually." He ignored Asahina's offended but also sad look.

His sentence had gotten Makoto's attention.

"You are here to help?" He asked.

_Now we are back on track_. 

Nagito smiled sweetly.

"Of course! Even though I am sure ultimates such as yourselves don't need help from trash like me, I hope to be somewhat useful to our saviours!" He cooed, opening his arms wide.

He didn't really notice the awkward silence as he removed his backpack from his behind and pulled out the notebook he has been carrying. As he flipped to the last page he pointed to the map that was attached to the notebook.

"This region is where you guys are having trouble with getting any information about the remnants of the Kuzuryuu clan that's wreaking havoc isn't it? They are also highly territorial so it’s really hard for you guys to get any information about them, correct?" He lifted his eyes away from the map to look at them so he could confirm his theory.

Kyoko didn't seem to have a reaction, Asahina was confused, Makoto looked surprised and Byakuya had a frown on his face.

"How do you know this?" Byakuya demanded the answer.

"Well I heard Pekoyama and Hajime talk about having difficulties with their current mission and I just guessed but... I can say my guess was correct, right?"

Byakuya adjusted his glasses. "Well you may be correct but what are you planning on doing about it?"

Before Nagito could answer Kyoko started speaking.

"He is planning on going there alone and gathering information about their whereabouts and their numbers I assume."

Nagito felt a shiver up his spine as the Ultimate Detective stared him down while making her deduction.

"Wow! As expected from the Ultimate Detective! You are correct!" He clasped his hands with excitement.

"But we can't send you alone! That would be suicidal! We can- some of us can join you to assure your safety and the mission's success!" Makoto exclaimed worriedly.

Nagito felt amazed by the smaller boys' concern for someone like him. It almost made him cry on the spot but he prevented himself, it would look quite uncool and also they wouldn’t let him go if they saw him bawling like a child.

"You are right to worry about me not succeeding but I assure you, with my luck I can pull this off!" He tried to reassure.

"You- you are trusting your luck!? That's ridiculous! A lot of our agents have been killed in that region you know?!" Asahina yelled.

"What makes you think you can get the information other than just trusting blind luck? Even Makoto isn’t that reckless." Kyoko added after her.

Nagito felt insulted. He knew his luck looked unreal to others but these guys should have seen proof of it working countless times already.

Since his feelings on the matter wasn't important he continued while still pointing to the map.

"When I was in despair and masterless, I was held hostage by a biker gang here. While serving them for a little while and... steering them into despair I got to learn about their secret underground passages they were frequently using and I would guess the Kuzuryuu clan might be using their strategies, they didn't get along well after all and I heard the Kuzuryuu's ended them after Fuyuhiko wasn't there to control them." He finished his sentence. His eyes were unfocused while looking at the map, recalling uncomfortable past memories, his master - after concluding he had done his purpose- then was Fuyuhiko for a little while but he never shared these with him.

He at least wanted his experience to be of use to the people he wanted to see shine the brightest.

"A biker gang? Do you remember their name? " Makoto asked quietly.

"Hmm?... I think it had something to do with a gem but I don't remember. Is it important?" Nagito asked curiously. He should have paid more attention to them! It looked like they were important to Makoto somehow but he failed at being useful to him...

"No it's...okay." Makoto said, dejected. The others seemed to catch on to Makoto but none of them said anything.

After a minute of silence had passed, Kyoko was the one who spoke up.

"Are you sure you don't need any assistance?"

"Yes I am quite sure. If I had company, I'm positive my luck would harm them so going alone is the better option." As he finished his sentence the door opened with a loud slam!

Startled, everyone looked towards the door to be great by brown wild hair, well that's what Nagito first noticed at least.

"UUH DUDES WE ARE GETTING ATTACKED!"

Ah this must be the fifth survivor the others had talked about, based on his appearance and with the way he referred to them.

"WHAT?!" Asahina yelped.

"By who?" Asked Byakuya calmly.

"Monokuma herd!! So many of them dude oh my _god_ get out your microphone thingies and protect me! I broke mine!" Yasuhiro whimpered.

"Again?!" Makoto asked and added "Ne-never mind that! Let's get somewhere safe!"

“Did they get information that the five of us were here?” Kyoko questioned mostly to herself.

"This is truly unlucky but what do you guys think of my proposition?" Nagito asked calmly as they all left the room and stood in the corridor.

"This is not the time!! You guys should get to somewhere safe!" Asahina yelled angrily while pulling out her megaphone and trotting in place, excited but also frustrated to go to the front lines.

"I approve." Byakuya and Kyoko said in unison.

"Huh? Oh- Yea I approve too I guess." Makoto said after Nagito looked at him expectedly.

Byakuya reached towards Yasuhiro and took something from his hip.

"Hey that's mine!" He tried to reach for it but Byakuya tossed it to Nagito. When he caught it Byakuya stated, without even turning towards Yasuhiro "You don't even use it so you do not need it."

As Yasuhiro whined Nagito took a look at the machine in his hands. It was a walkie-talkie.

"You can reach us or some of the Future Foundation members if they are close enough to you, and also-" this time he reached behind Makoto to take his megaphone and held it towards Nagito.

"Hey!" It was Makoto's time to whine now. And before he could say anything Byakuya simply said " Your aim is terrible. Too bad aiming skills does not run in the family." Insulting Makoto but also being considerate of Nagito.

Nagito tried to gently decline it. "I am sure Makoto would put it to good use more than me and also I have this so I don't need it." He raised his left hand to prove his point.

"UUUGH Whatever!! Can we go already??" Ashina started running through the corridor without waiting for an answer.

"AAH ASAHINA YOU HAVE TO PROTECT ME PLEASE I WILL MAKE YOU DONUTS!" Yasuhiro ran after her.

Some Future Foundation member came and Byakuya left with them after he tossed the megaphone back to Makoto.

"We should leave too." Kyoko calmly spoke and started walking fast without waiting for Makoto.

"Ok! Good luck Nagito!" Makoto waved nervously as he ran up to Kyoko.

'Good luck' from one ultimate lucky student to the other. Nagito chuckled to himself in the now lonely corridor, only hearing the distant yelling.

He should get out too, he guessed.

As he walked through the corridor he felt relieved that he managed to convince them to let him go. He had lied since doing this mission wasn't his original plan as he left the island. It was something he had thought about when he was on the ship and it came in handy convincing the ultimates. He didn't trick them or anything. He was going to the place he had shown them but he didn't say the _exact_ place and it wasn't that important anyway. He was going to finish this mission. He would just make a detour at some part of it.

When he got out of the building he was met with some people ordering at others while some of them marched to a one specific location. As he gazed towards where these people headed he saw a little smoke trail up the dark sky.

He wondered if he should help but one of the running Future Foundation members' shoulder hit him while mouthing 'don't get in the way' so he decided to just leave.

Asking for directions seemed inappropriate at a time like this so he just followed the big road leading out of the docking station.

He hummed to himself an unfamiliar tune as he left the area while not paying attention to the distant war screams, mechanical laughing and exploding sounds of the monokumas as they all faded to the background.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to the people that leave comments! They make my day!   
> Also from this point on its going to be about Nagito's journey so if there is something you guys want to see happen like Nagito falling in a lake or something you can comment it! If i like it i might add it to the story! I already have some stuff planned but still!


	4. Florist

He was walking for quite a while now and he wasn't sure what time it was. The road he was walking on was pitch black even with a clear sky that's been illuminated by the full moon. 

Even though it was the start of October, he didn't feel as cold as when he exited the ship. Did he travel far enough on foot for the weather to change this much or the messed up climate of a world that has ended was too unstable? Or was it simply the fact that he has been walking for hours now, stopping every now and then, and it was keeping him warm?

Walking for hours wasn't something that was unfamiliar to him. Ever since he was little a lot of unfortunate things had happened to the lucky boy. Some ended up with him being miles away from the nearest civilization or just crashing down a literal deserted place. Even before falling into despair and traveling as much as he could to spread despair, he was used to walking around for hours.

He didn't have great stamina per-se because if he had to run he just couldn't do it. He was just capable of walking, he figured. Maybe even talented? He laughed to himself finding this train of thought hilarious.

His laugh didn't echo in the vast dark space he was walking on. Only the rubble and the trees listening to him, not minding his pitiful existence. He was alone. Whether no one liked him to get close to him or him pushing everyone away because of the possibility of his luck hurting them didn't matter. He was alone either way.

He started to feel tired again so he looked around that destroyed buildings around him. He could somehow make out what some of the buildings were supposed to be.

That one was a destroyed drug store.

This one was a destroyed internet cafe.

Was that one a vet or a coffee shop? He couldn't tell.

He passed all of them as he decided it would be too risky falling asleep in these unstable buildings. He was lucky yes, but he wasn’t stupid.

He passed maybe 10 more buildings and he was starting to feel desperate now. Anywhere with something covering him from the outside air should work, he just wanted to lay down.

He was sure he was at the end of this town? Village? Wherever this was as he saw one final building. It had a stone fence around it and the door was metal. When he got close to the door he noticed it was locked. How peculiar." Is there someone inside?" He wondered out loud while looking at the lock.

It was an old type of lock and it looked quite rusty. Perhaps he could just...pry it open? He looked around to find something strong enough to be used as a crowbar. There was a long metal piece right next to him but it was a piece that was sticking out from a broken wall. When he reached down to get a hold of it with his left hand, it immediately broke in the middle and made Nagito stumble back a little. So it wasn't as sturdy as it looked... well this made him realize how lucky he was as he looked at the crumbled pieces in his left hand. He smiled and simply turned around, gripped the lock with his left hand and.... broke it.

As the metal door creaked open he reminded himself to thank Kazuichi and Hajime for giving him such a blessing. He has thanked them endlessly before but that doesn't mean he was going to stop.

When he moved past the door he noticed this 2 story building was supposed to be a florist. Not because there were flowers around, they have wilted long time ago, only the boney remains and the dozens of pots making it clear that it was a florist full of color and life. Now it was just full of lifeless, broken husks and now with a lonely stranger.

He opened the door to the building that was darker than the night sky. He could not make out what was inside whatsoever and it kind of thrilled him. Would he see something horrifying? He hasn't seen any dead bodies on the streets yet and it was really weird. Maybe he couldn't see any because it was really dark. But that didn't mean anything as he suddenly heard something falling inside. The metallic sound echoing in the unseeable darkness.

He probably shouldn't go in, as it seemed like someone or _something_ was inside.

So he went inside. 

There didn't seem to be anything right in front of him but he really couldn't tell. Just some grass here and there peeking through the wooden floorboards.

He suddenly heard something to his right but as soon as he turned that way his coat seemed to be stuck in something.

“huh?” he breathed out panicking a little so he tried to pull it off but something fell from his side, making contact with the ground. As soon as that something fell, it flashed a bright light right to his face, blinding him. He rubbed his eyes as they burned at the sudden light. Trying to not look at the light beneath him, he peaked through his fingers. The light wasn't facing him anymore, it was shining to his shoes and he noticed what it was as soon as he looked down. It was his walkie-talkie. So it had a flashlight function! How lucky! He hasn't got a chance to examine it yet so he didn't know.

He bent down to pick it up and turned it towards the room. There were empty pots _everywhere_. Big and small, long and thin. All kinds of pots but no flowers to fill them. Only some overgrown vines here and there. There was also a table right in the middle of the big entryway and countertops at the corners of the big triangle room. The curtain was flowing like water with a gentle breeze through the open window. His attention was suddenly pulled to the ground as he noticed some kind of shadow move past between a big vase and another long one. He walked around a little slowly to see what it was, since now he knew it wasn't big he didn't feel that threatened by it. As he shone his -walkie-light? Flash-talkie? - towards it he saw two glowing yellow lights at the corner of the room and immediately knew what it was.

"Oh a cat. Hello little guy, sorry for breaking and entering your home. I will only stay here for the night, don't worry!" He tried to calm the obviously on alert cat, its hair standing up straight.

Hmm it didn't seem like it was going to calm down anytime soon so Nagito pulled the crackers out of his bag. He ate half of it while he was walking but it made his mouth dry and he forgot to take any water with him so he thought he could share it a little bit. It didn’t have any salt or anything but for a second he remembered Gundham saying some food weren’t good for animals due to salt and fat but since these were the only food he had on his person he decided to give it to it, hoping it wouldn’t do it any harm. He crumbled it a little bit and gestured for the cat to see it, tapping the floor a few times. 

The cat didn’t move from its place. He didn't feel like watching the cat so instead he got up and went to continue exploring the little shop.

The second floor's stairs were next to a door and when he opened it, it was just full of gardening equipment so he didn't look at it that much, looking for somewhere comfortable.

As he went up the unsteady stairs he was met with a quite surprising scenery.

It was a small bedroom with moonlight shining into it and it had a bed! This was really lucky. Uncomfortably so and it made Nagito almost turn around only to be screamed at by his tired muscles.

He gave into his tiredness so he climbed up the last 2 steps of the stairs and took a better look around. It was an average room and he just wanted to sleep in that bed but now that he looked at it, it was really dusty. He sighed, put down his bag, took off his jacket and rolled his sleeves. If he was going to sleep in a bed at least it shouldn't be dusty. He took the blanket and the pillow sheet and shook them off the window of the second floor. If there was someone outside they would surely notice him and probably do something but as his arm muscles started to get tired, he didn't care. He went back to the bed and considered dusting off the bed sheets as well but said "nah" and took his shoes off. When his head hit the bed he was immediately washed up with the exhaustion of walking for hours and drifted to sleep peacefully.

\--

The warm sunlight licking his face slowly woke him up from his weirdly peaceful sleep. 

Huh? Why was the sunlight wet?

When he opened his eyes with haste he made contact with 2 big orange orbs. It stopped and looked at him for a second, and continued licking his nose. Not used to something like this Nagito flinched away from the cat and lifted himself with his elbows and halfway rolled to his side. When he shook his head to wake up the sleepy away he was met with another pair of orange eyed cat. He couldn't have felt more awake as he looked down and saw that there was _another_ cat looking at him from the ground all curiously with its green eyes.

"Wh-what?" He stuttered uncharacteristically being only awake for 5 seconds and feeling like the most confused in his entire life.

"Mrroooo---oow" came the reply from yet _another_ cat that was on the bed, stretching lazily.

How many are there?!

He just looked at the cats, and the cats looked back at him. He counted them. Orange, gray, black and a mix. 4 cats?? Where did they come from? Wasn't there only one cat on the first floor? Did they come after he fell asleep or did he just miss them somehow? There were places he hadn’t checked before so maybe. Was he supposed to do something? He didn’t have any other pets than the one he had when he was a child and it was a dog. He didn’t know what to do with animals! That was Gundham’s thing! If only he could talk to him right now. But what would he even say to him?

While he was thinking useless thoughts the cat that was licking his face decided it was going to be sitting on his lap now since Nagito was in a sitting position and he noticed he _badly_ needed to pee. But _should_ or more like _can_ he even get up with this cat sitting on his lap? Oh no, the other one at the end of his bed that was stretching was moving towards him too. And now he had 2 cats sitting on his lap. Ah that’s great. The one right next to him that was definitely 3 months old –judging from how small it was- jumped up his shoulder now and the cat that was looking at him jumped to the bed to look at him more but it was still quite farther away from him and the other cats.

Ok this was insane. Not insane like his luck cycle but insane as in _what am I supposed to do??_

As he was frozen in place the little cat on his shoulder jumped to his head and started chewing on his hair it would have been cute if its nails didn’t slowly dig into his head.

"Ow!" He exaggerated as his right hand shut up to his head to grab the cat but before he could catch it, it jumped down to his back and then to the bed.

The cats that were on his lap started biting each other's ears and got up to chase each other so he took this as an opportunity to get up and go to the toilet.

As he released himself in the toilet downstairs he was happy that this place actually had a toilet.

He noticed the cats have followed him inside the toilet and were just sitting and watching him like they had some kind of duty they had to do. "Ok this is just weird." He said to no one that cared.

After he was finished he was pleasantly surprised to find that the tap water was running. Well barely. Maybe the place was connected to a private water system? It was also quite weird that this place wasn’t destroyed completely like the other buildings. Well it was just a florist so maybe the rioters didn’t care enough? They didn’t care about where they destroyed though…

He went upstairs to gather his stuff while being followed by like little ducklings following their mother as he was thinking about if this place had some sort of a secret behind it. He got his jacket and when he grabbed his bag he noticed it was scratched, the cats have probably smelled the food in it even though it didn’t have a strong smell at all. He wondered for a second. Do cats actually eat cracker kind of stuff or did they like the smell of it? He wasn't sure but after wearing his backpack and turning around, he found all 4 cats sitting and looking up at him all cutely and he stopped. They wanted the crackers didn't they? Well there doesn't seem to be anyone left to feed them and he was just slept in _their_ house right so he sighed and opened his bag to take out all of the crackers. He opened and crumbled them while the cats started eating them hungrily. He never saw cats eating crackers before. Was this normal? Well it didn't matter because he was going to leave anyway....

But he could at least pet them before he left right? He crouched down to the none caring cats and petted the fluffiest one that had licked his nose in the morning. It didn't even flinch.

He smiled a little and got up.

"Thank you for your.... hospitality?" He said, now feeling silly for talking to cats of all things.

He had a little thought that came out of nowhere that stopped him from leaving. So he sat down on the bed one last time, pulled out his notebook and got the pen that was attached to it with a cord and started doodling the cats. He didn’t want to forget about this because it could be a thing he could talk about in the future with Gundham. They didn’t converse that much because Nagito wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say to the Ultimate Breeder when he didn’t really have that many experiences with animals.

The black one was the one he saw yesterday -was it today? He got only 3-4 hours of sleep he guessed- the second one was a really fluffy gray one but it looked like its back leg was injured, the third one was the little orange one with a big tummy and the last one, a mixture of colors. When he finished his quite bad drawing of the cats with arrows pointing at them with "names" -that were just each of their colors- he grimaced at his hand writing, it was quite ugly just as he remembered it.

He looked at them last time before walking down the stairs. When he couldn't see them anymore he breathed out a little satisfied hum and left the house.

"That was weird." He said to no one again and continued his journey feeling more lighthearted after leaving the ship. He embraced himself for the day, now having sunlight to actually see his way and the horrible truth of their destroyed and rebuilding world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some fluff before we move onto dark stuff! I don't know if im going to be able write about bad things though ^^"


	5. Hospitality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking so long to update! This chapter was really hard to write for some reason. I was even going to make it much more longer but i decided to cut it for another chapter instead. I have so many ideas but i dont think i will be able to write them all haha  
> Edit* : I forgot to tidy up the parapraphs sorry!

"Hmm what to do..." Nagito wondered out loud, tapping his finger at his chin, looking up at the clear afternoon sky.

The reason why he was troubled was because right in front of him was supposed to be a tunnel that would cut his travel time to the region that the Kuzuryuu Clan was holding hostage. But the tunnel had been destroyed, completely blocking the tunnel even some old bodies and cars were left under the rubble meaning it's been a while.

"Oh well I guess lady luck isn't at my side today." He shook his head at how unlucky he was and figured he needed to go around the mountain that was blocking his way since climbing it wasn't an option. 

As he started walking towards the road he came from he tried to remember if him and his classmates were responsible for this one. It seemed obvious the tunnel was attacked by people that were under despair. But he didn't know if they had done it or was it someone else. Him and the other previous remnants had done *so much* that it was almost impossible to know which ones they were responsible for. And also because of his previous condition it was even harder for Nagito to remember. The reason why he was even trying to remember was because if it was them then he was just unlucky, but if it was the Kuzuryuu clan then they were not just attacking people out of nowhere, that they had strategies and a goal. Well not like he could get anywhere with the information he had at the moment... The most stuff he knew about them is when Fuyuhiko was their head they were extremely territorial and lethal, killing people and only allowing them to live if they joined the Kuzuryuu's. So they were extremely dangerous without a leader; they were unpredictable, since almost all of them were controlled with a monokuma head, making them all flesh puppets. The person in charge could make them kill mercilessly or use them as meat shields.

Well thinking about these was not doing him any good since he was basically going to barge into their territory without backup or any weapons. Well his prosthetic arm had some functions thanks to Kazuichi begging Hajime to make it "at least a little bit cool!" and Hajime reluctantly agreed to it. He knew Hajime didn't like the idea because he thought Nagito could still be dangerous. Hajime insisted on "keeping an eye on '' Nagito a couple of times after all. Even after everything that happened he still couldn't obtain Hajime's full trust... or it was _because_ of everything that happened, everything that Nagito _made_ happen.

As Nagito was deep in melancholy thoughts, walking on the side of the broken road, he heard a distant scream and some additional sounds. He decided to get close to it as he got curious about it. It could be a gruesome scene or some kind of lead and he wasn't sure which one it was so he left it to his luck.

"AAH! JUST GET AWAY FROM ME YOU DISGUSTING BEAR!"

As he peeked from behind a broken car he saw a Monokuma clawing at -what he could only guess- a fence that was bend a weird way towards a building wall. Between the fence and the wall was a small space that was occupied by a crying child as Monokuma’s claw was frantically swinging to them but the fence bars blocked his claws _just_ close enough to not hit the child. But as he kept hitting the bars they would slightly bend inwards due to pressure, getting closer to the kid with each strike.

Nagito decided to help the poor kid. He really didn't want to see a young hope in this kind of world to get crushed right in front of him.

"HEY!!" He yelled as loud as he could, freezing the Monokuma’s movements, hoping it would turn towards him. If he wanted to strike it he needed to get his left eye. As the Monokuma started to turn towards him, he quickly took a small piece of rock beneath him with his left hand and threw it at him as hard as he could!.

.. and missed him completely. In no time the Monokuma started charging towards him but it was quite slow and that allowed him to pick another rock and he took a deep breath, aimed, and threw it again! This time the rock hit it right in the red robotic eye clearly causing a malfunction as it buzzed and twitched on the spot. He wanted to finish it off with throwing another rock but the connecting bridge between his prosthetic and his flesh stung a little bit so instead he picked up a long metal piece that was lucky in front of him with his right hand, got close to the bear and impaled it into its eye. The bear heavily fell backwards saying some random line and powering off completely.

"Huff... well that takes care of it." As he realized he was slightly out of breath he took a quick glance to where the kid was.

And he saw nothing. The fence was opened outwards so it was clear the kid got out themselves. It would have been great if he could be sure that the kid was safe but oh well, he wasn't going to go and search for the kid mindlessly. He had a mission after all.

Not really feeling accomplished Nagito left to continue on his way.

He needed to make use of the daylight and hopefully find a place to stay at night. He was sure he wasn't going to get as lucky as the florist shop again though. That bed was really comfortable for his tired body.

As he continued he reached a split road, one going right and the other going left. There was a metal sign but it was in a burned pile so it wasn't possible to read. Before he even tried to take out his notebook that had the map he heard-

"Why did you help me?"

The high pitched voice was coming from his right, between some trees. He noticed a little brown side ponytail sticking out from behind a tree that was 5-6 meters away followed by cautious but curious green eyes.

"Ah, are you the kid that was getting attacked by Monokuma?"

The kid’s brows furrowed, mouth a little open as if they were a little confused.

"Monokuma? Is that what those things are called?" They questioned with a quiet voice, still cautious of Nagito.

"Yes those bears that go around attacking people are called Monokuma’s. Well it looks like you weren't hurt if you were able to trail me without being noticed. I’m glad!" He smiled at the kid hoping to ease them. He never knew what to say or what to do with little kids so it was a little difficult for him to converse with them. Mahiru had said that he would be a great stay at home dad but he wasn't really sure about that.

"I-I was fine on my own! Why did you-why would you help someone else? You don't even know me!" The kid was clearly confused and Nagito didn't really have an explanation that the kid would understand. But he still tried to explain anyway.

"Well I couldn't just let a seed of hope that could build the future just get smashed right in front of me!"

"What are you saying? Seed of hope? Build the future? Are you a crazy old man?"

Ah, well that was rather...blunt. "Ahaha I might as well be a crazy old man huh... although I’m only 23 you know." He tried to laugh off the feeling of being compared to an old man.

"23?! But you have white hair just like my grandma! And she is like 1000 years old! Hmm... well you do have a smoother face than my grandma... her skin just wiggles y'know." The kid said looking like they just remembered something disgusting. They were a little farther away from the tree letting Nagito see them now but still far away. They had a brown winter jacket on but the front was open and on the inside was a green plain shirt with some baggy black pants. From the looks of it the kid must have been 10-11, no scratches or bruises on sight and they looked quite healthy. He expected more... runaway kind of look but they looked completely fine.

"Um... My grandma always says that I should be grateful so... i guess... thank you, for saving me." The kid started playing with their shirt probably out of nervousness and Nagito felt happy to be getting gratitude.

"No probl- augh!" He felt such a familiar sharp pain in his left arm it was unbelievable! "Ugh why now?..." he muttered holding his arm.

"Huh? What's hap- what happened? Are you ok?" The kid inched closer holding out a hand unconsciously, their face full of worry.

"Aha, I’m ok. This just happens from time to time." Except it was a lie. This kind of cramp like pain only happened after his surgery and while he was recovering. He hadn't felt this pain for months. Maybe he went a little overboard with throwing those rocks. He suddenly remembered what Hajime had said to Kazuichi while he was begging to make his prosthetic cooler.

-

"You do know that he is missing an arm and having his prosthetic do "cool stuff" could potentially harm him right?" Hajime said while looking at Kazuichi with furrowed brows and his hands folded upon his chest.

"But brooo! You know Akane mocked me and now I _have_ to show her what I'm capable of! She would be faster than anything i could make my ass!" Kazuichi pouted clearly looking irritated.

"Nagito is not your toy Kazuichi! He is a human being! Go make another machine instead of using him!" Hajime exclaimed, raising his voice just a little bit.

Kazuichi looked really dejected so Nagito interfered.

"I don't mind Hajime! In fact, I would be honored if I could be a stepping stone for Kazuichi to show off his ultimate and prove how much he can do to everyone else! I would be delighted to be a help of that!" Nagito said, meaning every word with his whole heart.

Hajime looked a little taken aback even though he should be used to hearing stuff like this from Nagito. And seeing Hajime falter a little Kazuichi took the opportunity" Look! he wants it and i want it so it totally ok! Consent!" He gave a thumbs up to Hajime, a little too close to his face. Hajime made a face that was screaming 'uncomfortable' and reached to the thumbs up in front of his face, grabbed it and turned it upside down, making it a thumbs down.

"Do not say it like that ever again." He stared right into Kazuichi's eyes, making him squirm.

Nagito reached for Hajime's hand and gently pulled it away from Kazuichi. Hajime looked at their hand for a second before locking eyes with Nagito and his reassuring smile.

"It’s ok Hajime. I really don't mind. But if your concern is something else than I understand." He said pulling his hand away because if he held it any longer he would just not want to let go.

Hajime looked at his own hand, slowly pulling it away as well while saying " what do you mean?"

"Well I totally understand if you didn't want someone like me to have possibly dangerous abilities. I know that you are still cautious of me but I wouldn't dare to use Kazuichi’s hopeful skills for harmful things I promise!" Nagito huffed out desperate to make Hajime trust him.

Hajime looked baffled instead. "That's not what I-....ugh you know what, fine! You can add some stuff but don't go overboard ok?! I have to go meet up with Hiyoko next and I _really_ don't want to waste my energy right now..." He breathed out and left the makeshift hospital room with a very happy Kazuichi and a content Nagito.

-

Ah right that's what he meant then. Having the ability of throwing a rock so fast that it could break a robot bear was probably not good on his arm.

"Ah! You are in pain because you saved me didn't you! Uum... I’m so sorry! Ok, uuh, ah! my grandma! She would know how to treat wounds! Come with me!" The kid started pulling on the front of his jacket, leading him away. The pain was unbearable so he followed them.

After going through between some old broken buildings and the woods they reached a small building that was all alone in the forest with a single road leading up to it. The sun was shining down on it as if telling Nagito he was on the right track.

The road looked recently used, he noticed while being dragged forward. Weird. But before he could think more about it the kid started yelling.

"GRANDMAA! HEEEY! GRANDMAA HELP!"

"Ah for god's sake what are you yelling about?!" Came the answer from the cottage's slowly opening door. The old woman froze when she saw them both.

"Who is that?!" She yelled and hid behind the door.

"Don't worry he saved my life from those robot bears! But he got injured and you gotta help him!" The kid’s words made their grandma come out of the door and get close to them. Nagito and the kid had stopped and the old lady slowly got closer to them looking at Nagito the whole time. She was probably afraid of him doing something harmful to them but funny enough he wouldn't even harm them if he wanted to. He was pretty weak for a guy and his left arm was completely useless, not to mention he hadn't eaten anything proper since he left the island. It would be more appropriate if he was scared of them instead.

The lady was clearly old, her back was hunched, her legs seemed pretty thin, her hair was white just like Nagito's and he had quite the intimidating stare. As the old lady got close enough Nagito decided that he needed to introduce himself.

"Hello. My name is Nagito and I am just a traveler. I happen to pass by your grandkid and saw they were getting attacked and decided to help. I seem to hurt myself a little and it's not the kids fault. I am very thankful for the worry but I would hate to invade your personal space so i will be on my way once the kid lets go of me." He smiled to make sure he wasn't being rude. The old lady stared at him, not a change of expression was on her face since she opened the door. She stared into Nagito's eyes. Gray-green meeting dark brown. For a second Nagito thought he was going to get beaten down before the old lady opened her mouth that was missing some teeth.

"Give me your bag." She demanded with strength behind her voice.

"Ah am I getting mugged?" Nagito asked, feeling a little tense although he had a small smile on his lips. The lady’s burrows knitted together and she said "give me your bag" again, a little sturdy this time. Nagito sighed. Well this was not nice at all. As he slowly removed the bag from his back, being careful to not touch his left arm as it hurt even moving it. Honestly he just wanted to find a secluded place, take the arm off and find something to eat before taking painkillers and rest a little bit.

As he gave the bag to her the kid that was on his side just watching suddenly chirped up "Grandma what are you doing?! I brought him here so you could help him not so you could steal his stuff!!"

The old lady shut a quick glance at the kid to shut them up. Which worked perfectly as they looked into Nagito's eyes apologetically. As the lady stopped searching inside Nagito's very much empty bag while letting out a sigh; he couldn't tell if she was disappointed or relieved. She looked at Nagito and then turned towards the house.

"Come inside." She beckoned and went inside the house, dragging Nagito's bag on the ground -since she was short- at her side. 

The kid gasped and looked at Nagito with a big smile before pulling on his jacket to get him inside eagerly. Confused, Nagito just let the kid lead him inside.

The house was kept clean and warm, giving a homely feeling Nagito hasn't felt in a very, very long time.

"Sit." The old lady commanded towards the sofa in the living room. "And you," she pointed at the kid "go get my medicine bag.". The kid bolted upstairs as soon as they were given the instructions and left Nagito with their grandma. She then looked at Nagito briefly, told him to take his jacket off and wait for her. Nagito did as he was told and sat on the sofa, giving himself a little rest and trying to understand what was exactly happening. As far as he could tell he wasn't getting mugged since his bag was sitting beside him and he hasn't been harmed. But it would be really naive to think he was safe. The world night be recovering from despair but this didn't mean he would just meet with good willed people. Well he could actually, if his luck allowed it.

"You... are missing an arm." He heard before he was hit with the delicious smell of food the old lady was carrying on a tray. He wouldn't assume that the food was for him so he just answered a question that hasn't been asked. "Yes. I unfortunately lost it but i am really lucky enough to have my prosthetic."

"Yea, you are..." she said while putting down the tray on his lap.

"Ah is this...for me?" He asked since he couldn't be sure.

"Why else would i put it on your lap? Just eat it before I give you medicine, you look like you only have skin and bones." She said sharply.

"I am really grateful for your kindness." He really was grateful. It was really, _really_ rare for someone to show kindness like this to a stranger, to him especially. He looked at the food in front of him. Bread and soup with a glass of water on the side. Could it be... did it have poison inside? Did she think a violent kill would be too much of a hassle so did she just decide to poison him? Or would she knock him out and take him someplace else to finish him instead? Or-

"Are you gonna eat it or are you just waiting to let it get cold?" She asked irritated, pulling Nagito out of his trance. He suddenly felt a sharp pain on his arm and decided to take it off. He felt the old lady's eyes on him as he took his arm off and put it next to him.

His long sleeve dangled freely on his left arm as he decided to eat the food that was prepared for him. It's been awhile since he ate something properly so he savored the taste and the warmth as much as he could.

"I finally found them! Why would you put your medicine bag under your bed grandma? Do you know how hard I had to look to find it?!" The kid yelled as they descended the stairs, clutching a black women’s bag. As they gave the bag to their grandmother they suddenly exclaimed "AAh your arm!!!!" Pointing to Nagito's prosthetic.

"Stop yelling and sit, you are giving me a headache!" The old lady yelled as well. As the old lady explained and calmed down the kid Nagito finished his meal.

"It was delicious, thank you." He said and tried to get up with the tray on his right hand, trying to use his torso as support and get up but the old lady pulled him down to sit again, took the tray out of his hand and shoved it to her grandkid, who complained as they were told to clean it.

"Do at least this much for the man that saved your life!" Was what convinced the kid to comply.

When the kid left the old lady beckoned Nagito to get closer so he did. She folded his dangling sleeve up and looked at his arm. The place where the metal and his skin was connecting looked irritated as it was red. She touched it a little, making Nagito hiss out of pain. "You're making a big deal." She said and started searching through her medicine bag.

"My apologies for the trouble." He scratched his neck with his right hand to ease the nervousness he was feeling. She made a gurgling noise to acknowledge his apology and continued searching through her bag that was full of medicine. After some time, she took some pills and tossed them to Nagito. Nagito didn't even need to read the label to know what it was as he took these painkillers for a long time since his childhood. He took one pill and downed it with the water in one gulp, not wanting to taste it because it was quite disgusting. As he put down the cup he noticed that the old lady was in deep thought. For a minute the only sound was the clanking of plates as the kid cleaned them in the kitchen.

"Do you know the remnants of despair?" Wasn't something Nagito was expecting to hear from the old lady. The question felt like a punch in the gut and he wasn't sure what the intentions behind it were. " The people responsible for the tragedy yes?" He acted dumb to make her talk. "Hah! They did not _only_ cause the tragedy! They took my son and my husband away from me!" She suddenly yelled. Nagito didn't know what to do or say, so he just stayed quiet. He expected her to say more things but she didn't say anything, just murmured something under her breath, shot a glance at Nagito and got up as the kid entered the living room.

"I am going out to get some air, you keep an eye on him." She said to the kid and left.

"Huh? Why is she so grumpy all of a sudden?" The kid asked to no one in particular. To Nagito she seems grumpy all the time but apparently not.

The kid dried their hands on their clothes and gasped. "I didn't even tell you my name! Its Akira!" Nagito smiled.

"Hey do you need something? Do you need a massage? Or water? Or do you wanna sleep?" Akira asked ferociously, making Nagito lean back a little.

"Ah I would hate to bother but... do you know someplace I can wash my jacket?" He has been wanting to wash it for a while now and since Akira offered... "oh sure thing!" Akira immediately got up and fetched his jacket and headed upstairs.

"Where are you going?" Nagito asked behind them.

"Huh? I'm gonna put it in the washing machine. Why?" Akira asked back.

"You guys have electricity here?" Now that was weird. As far as Nagito knew the region they were in was completely cut off from electricity.

"We didn't have it a couple of months ago. A group of men in suits came and helped us!" Akira said happily and left to go upstairs. A group of men in suits? It sounded like Future Foundation but why would they fix electricity for a random house? He decided to investigate the house a little bit.

First he flipped the light switch in the living room and to no surprise it lit the room in a yellow light. Next, he turned the tap to find they had access to water as well, no hot water though. He went back to the living room and looked around. The first thing he noticed was the family photos they had on the shelves. It had the old lady, an old man and a young couple holding a baby. They all looked happy. The old lady had said she lost her husband and her son to the remnants of despair and Nagito was pretty sure the baby was Akira. The only one he didn't know anything about was Akira's mother.

"Oh, are you looking for books to read?" Said Akira as they hopped down the stairs.

"Pardon me asking but is your mother around?" Nagito suddenly asked, making Akira freeze for a second.

"Um...she is working. With the men with suits i talked about before." Akira was looking away from Nagito while answering. It looked like it was uncomfortable for them to talk about but Nagito didn't really notice.

"What kind of work does your mother do?" He asked without hesitation.

" uuh if I remember correctly she said something about... transporting animals?" Akira answered while fidgeting with their hands.

"Transporting animals?" Nagito echoed. That was a... weird job. Especially for their current time. Was it for farming? "Can you contact your mother?" Nagito asked further. If she was with the Future Foundation and if she was close maybe they could give him a ride?

"Yeah! Well sometimes actually... Grandma only says we should call her if it's an emergency..." as Akira finished their sentence the walkie-talkie in Nagito's bag suddenly started making noises. Nagito went to his bag, opened it and took it out. He couldn't really understand what was being said though.

"..........s......k...whi...rem......des......missi...ar...stay..p.....oming...daw...roger" was all they could hear before it completely cut off.

"Huh? What was that?" Akira asked curiously.

"I'm not really sure. That was quite bizarre... Is there any place that might have better connection?" Nagito looked down at the kid.

"Hm I’m not sure. But high places are always good for connection right? So what about the second floor?" Akira suggested and Nagito nodded.

They tried to get some response from the walkie-talkie for a while but didn't succeed. Nagito decided to get some rest for the time being because he was feeling _very_ tired all of a sudden. He didn't accept sleeping on any of the beds because he said it wasn't right to do to a very confused Akira and decided to lay down on the living room sofa instead. Before he slowly fell into a deep sleep the last thing he heard was Akira's worried voice.

“Grandma who are they?"

.

..

....

......


	6. How Do I Feel?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new years! I can't believe its 2021... so weird haha!

"I thought I told you to send him back. What do you mean you don't know where he is?" The uncharacteristically chilling voice froze Makoto on the spot, even though they weren't talking face to face.

"I know I just... he made a good proposition and we decided to send him out for a mission but at the time we got attacked by a horde of Monokuma’s and... we haven't been able to contact him since." Hajime gave a loud sigh. He didn't blame Makoto; he was just irritated. Leave it to Nagito to pull off something like this. Well something unpredictable like this was expected of Nagito.

-

The night before Nagito went missing Hajime was just in his cottage, thinking about what the hell had happened between him and Nagito at the beach. He stayed up quite late, somehow his thoughts about Nagito drifting to his time with Chiaki. Maybe it was because he felt calm and being with them brightened his mood. 

He knew he shouldn't be stuck in the past but he couldn't help it. He did not correctly appreciate the short amount of time he spent with Chiaki when she was still alive. He was just stuck up on how talentless and useless he was. After meeting Chiaki that feeling grew stronger. He wanted to be someone that could stand next to her proudly without feeling insignificant. He wanted to be able to hang out with her and her friends she loved to talk about as passionately as she loved talking about video games. He wanted to be with them. He wanted to be with her. He wanted to hold her hand. But he wasn't enough. She never said that though, he was the one who thought about it. If only he stopped worrying about his worth and paid more attention to her, maybe he could have made her happy, just a little bit. If only he stopped caring about talent so much. He had all the talent he wanted in the end. But he lost her. He could have saved her, he had the power. But instead he just watched her die right in front of him. Not moving a muscle, not feeling anything.

And she still saved him. In the neo world program, when he thought it didn't matter anymore. 

At least he was able to say thank you to her.

As he got sleepy thinking too much he suddenly remembered a memory. Well it was more like someone else shoved it at his face because they were bored of the current situation.

He was at the beach, a fake beach. Neo world program was able to create a very realistic looking beach but after seeing the real thing he felt stupid for falling for it. Ah right, he wasn't alone. He had invited Nagito to hang out with him. At the time he just thought Nagito was lying to him to mess with him. But now he knew that wasn't the case... 

"...Nagito...just tell me one thing, and be honest.

If you didn't have your Ultimate Luck...what would you be doing instead?" He asked after getting a whiplash from their long conversation. Nagito was deep in thought, as if he had thought about it before but never said it out loud. 

"I guess I would probably be living a peaceful life... A boring, normal life with no hope and no despair." Was Nagito's answer. He talked as if he despised the idea but Hajime knew he wanted a life like that secretly. He saw how he was like in the world he defensively built inside the Neo World Program after all.

After hearing his answer Hajime turned away from him to leave. He was still deep in thought but he still heard Nagito's distant voice behind him.

"Please, don't forget...

From the bottom of my heart...I am truly in love with yo-...the hope that sleeps inside you."

Hajime suddenly got up from where he was laying, his eyes wide and his heart beating as if it was stuck in his throat. The sudden movement made his head spin.

"Wh-what?... was that.... was that what he meant...?"

He clenched his shirt above his rapidly beating heart and felt his face flush. Nagito was in... in love with him?!

**It is quite obvious.**

No it isn't! If it was he would have figured it out already! Right?! There is no way!

**“...“**

Well, what was he supposed to do now? How was he supposed to act around him in the morning?! Should he say that he knew what he meant now? But wait, before that, how was he feeling towards him? Ok wait he needed to think about this carefully.

Whenever he hung out with Nagito he felt calm and at peace. It was fun being around him as well. But it was fun hanging out with Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi too. Hm but... it didn't feel exactly the same as Nagito did it? He always felt like he had a different, mysterious kind of bond with him. He wanted to know more about him and understand him. They bickered from time to time but that didn't destroy their...friendship? Could he call it that anymore since he knew how Nagito felt towards him now?... and UGH can his stupid heart stop beating this fast already?! It was getting annoying! It's not like he was in love!...........right?

He felt himself get even redder. He couldn't think like this! While feeling all...fuzzy and... warm! He needed out!

So he got up and bolted out of his cottage. Oh it was _cold_. He shivered, holding his arms and glanced towards Nagito's cottage. He was probably asleep right now. His heartbeat quickened a little as he remembered Nagito sleeping peacefully when he was recovering at the hospital. He shook his head to get rid of the memory. Why did he watch him sleep?! That was creepy! Yeah absolutely not necessary or cute, it was creepy! 

This was a lost cause... he needed advice. He went to Fuyuhiko's door. He was in a healthy relationship with Peko so he was the best option to talk about this stuff. But he stopped himself from knocking on the door at the last second. What if Peko was inside? That would be awkward... It's not like he didn't trust Peko; he just... wanted to talk to his close friend first. So instead of knocking on Fuyuhiko's door he went to Kazuichi's door.

"Ugh... do you know what time it is.... Hajime? You ok?" Kazuichi greeted him, rubbing sleep out of his eyes.

"Let me in, it's freezing out here." Hajime went past Kazuichi without waiting for a response.

"Woah man! what happened? Did you have a *yawn* nightmare or something?"

"Nagito likes me." Hajime cut to the point bluntly.

"Huh? Uh, yea?" Kazuichi scratched his head, too sleepy to catch onto what Hajime was telling him.

" No no you don't get it. He _likes_ likes me. You know... ro-romanticly." Hajime said, slowly blushing as he reached at the end of his sentence. Kazuichi seemed more awake at this.

"What makes you say that? At this hour especially..." he said while avoiding his tools on the ground as if he remembered where they were by heart, and sat on his messy bed that matched his messy hair. "Uh he said that, ah.... that he was...in love with...the hope that sleeps inside of me." As he finished his sentence, he felt ridiculous and he knew what Kazuichi was going to say before he even opened his mouth.

"Isn't that what he usually says? Like, all the time?" He said, raising his eyebrow.

"Well yeah... but this was different. He said it directly to me and he stuttered, he was going to say "I love you" but said "the love inside of you" instead." Hajime talked, one finger up, as if he was talking in a class trial.

"Hm. Well I don't know dude it just seems like normal Nagito nonsense to me." Kazuichi said while yawning and lying down on his bed with a *thud*. Hajime sighed and frowned at his unenthusiastic friend.

"You are a great listener Kazuichi..." he said sarcastically. Kazuichi actually picked up on his sarcasm and lifted himself on his elbows.

"Dude what do you want me to say? I just can't imagine Nagito to fall in love with anyone. He seems more like a loner ya know. I can imagine him having a countryside cottage house, old and alone with a dog. Doin' some farmin' and livin' like that...." He was rambling sleepily now. Hajime gave a sigh, all of his excitement leaving his body, and settled on Kazuichi's big couch. Was he right? Did he misinterpret Nagito's words?

As he slowly sank into the couch he heard a distant yell. He didn't want to get up and investigate though, he was feeling embarrassed and a little depressed. 

He slumped further into the couch as Kazuichi's snores got louder. He probably shouldn't have asked him, he was tired and sleepy from rushing the machines he made for Future Foundation since he was too focused on Sonia's present. Oh well, they could talk about this tomorrow. Kazuichi's sleepiness must have rubbed on him because he fell into sleep just like that.

.

..

...

"Hey. Hey dude. Hajime! Heeey wake up!! Stop drooling on my couch and wake up!!"

His eyes shot open as soon as Kazuichi touched him. " **Stop shouting Souda, it's annoying.** " Was all it took for Kazuichi to shut his mouth for a second before saying, "O-oh hi. Good morning, haha" he scratched his neck, the indicator of his nervousness. 

He readjusted himself into a better position, as his muscles were sore from sleeping in an awkward position. As he got up, he stared at the wall for some time. Blinking the sleep away from his eyes and adjusted to the surroundings.

"Huh? Oh good morning Kazuichi." Hajime looked up at the pink haired mechanic who was looking at Hajime funny. "Is there something on my face?" He asked, checking to see if he drooled and unpleasant to find that the answer was yes. As he got up Kazuichi scratched his chin "Maan you did that thing again! You scare me sometimes ya know!" 

He knew what Kazuichi was referring to, as many of the others have pointed it out to him before. It was inevitable, him and Izuru did not completely merge together. Even though there were aspects of Hajime in Izuru and Izuru in Hajime. 

He didn't know if he should call him a split personality or an alter or anything else. Or if he should call himself those things. Izuru was the one who got invaded with Hajime's memories after all. He had been trying to figure himself out all this time but he also didn't really want to think about it too much.

Both Izuru and Hajime were him. And he was them. As long as he wasn't in despair, everything was fine.

"Yea sorry about that. I guess Izuru is kinda scary huh?" Hajime said smiling to himself sadly as he went to the bathroom. After using the bathroom and washing his face, he stopped to look at his eye, his red eye.

"Actually, you know" Kazuichi paused to think, " He isn't as scary as before. He never said our names. I think your influence on him made him softer!" Kazuichi said, laughing to himself while unknowingly making Hajime let out a soft chuckle as well.

.

..

"It's fine, he didn't mean it like that, it's fine..." Hajime repeated to himself to somehow calm his nerves enough so in the very least he could look Nagito in the eye at breakfast. Kazuichi was right next to him, looking at him as if he was the weirdest thing he had seen. "What the hell are you murmuring about?" The familiar voice came from behind him. "Good morning Fuyuhiko." "Morning!!" Kazuichi greated him as well.

"Yo." Was Fuyuhiko's short greeting and he continued without missing a beat. "Why do you look like a sad and anxious puppy this early in the morning?" He said as he elbowed Hajime.

Kazuichi answered before he could. “He’s got a crush on Nagito and is scared to see him right now." 

The gasp Hajime let out was the loudest gasp he ever did in his life. "WHAT?! No! I'm not the one who has a c-crush! It's _Nagito_ not _me_! He love...loves.......Where did you even get the idea that I have a crush on him, huh?!" He stopped to take a breather and look at his two friends in front of him. They both looked shocked to the bone.

Until Fuyuhiko burst out laughing. "HO-HOLY SHIT! I've _never_ seen you like this! AHAHHAHAH! You actually do have a crush on him don't you!?" He doubled over laughing as he saw Hajime's face go an even deeper shade of red.

"Huh?? Wait, you have a crush on Nagito?? I was just joking! What?!" Kazuichi looked confused and shocked at the same time. "Can you two stop being too loud?!" Hajime started yelling to stop their yelling. Some people at the currently empty pool side glanced towards them but as soon as they saw who the yelling belonged to they continued minding their own business.

"Ok first of all I’m not the one who has a crush" Hajime sharply pointed at Fuyuhiko just before he started laughing again " it’s Nagito, and secondly I... don’t know how to act towards him since I know how he feels..."

"How the hell did you not know he was head over heels for you? Don’t you like, have all of those talents jammed into your brain? Should we add 'Ultimate Oblivious Idiot' as one of your titles as well?" Fuyuhiko said, smiling sarcastically.

"Fuyuhiko I am serious." Hajime inserted.

"I am serious as well. How did you not notice the way he looked at you? Did you really not see it once?" Fuyuhiko questioned. " I... Look that's not the problem here ok?... I just don't know what to do." Hajime said, feeling a little down. "Well if you don't like him that way just like you claim to, then you can tell that to his face and get it over with." Fuyuhiko noticed Hajime avoid his gaze and smiled a little softer this time

"Look Hajime, I can just talk big shit here but none of them matter until you sort out how you feel towards him. Just act how you would normally act and in the meantime find out if you like him like that or not. Hell, use one of your talents that's related to acting for all I care." He sighed a little, knowing Hajime did not like using his talents for useless crap.

Hajime finally looked convinced so Fuyuhiko gave him a little forceful pat on the back and walked in front of them to the restaurant. 

"Man he is cool." Kazuichi commented before walking as well.

"Heh, he is." Hajime admitted and joined them.

Nagito was not at the restaurant. 

"Damn it I hyped myself up for nothing..." Hajime murmured to himself while taking a freshly made meal from a curious Teruteru. 

Fuyuhiko decided to ask everyone that was in the restaurant if they had seen Nagito. 

Everyone said the same thing. The last time they had seen him was yesterday morning. Until a very moody Hiyoko entered the room without a certain redhead she always hung around with. Poor Kazuichi was the one to ask her if she saw Nagito. 

"Don't talk to me! I don't care about that cree-... about that idiot ok!" She yelled at his face. Correcting herself as if ‘creep’ and ‘idiot’ had different insult levels.

Hajime could tell she wasn’t being truthful so after confronting her and promising her that he would talk to Mahiru and help them make up, she finally spoke.

"Well I saw him really early in the morning. He was going to the fifth island. I asked him what he was doing and he insulted me! So I left. I don't know anything else..." she finished with a huff.

The fifth island? He didn't like the implications of that. Nagito hasn't really hung around that island as far as he could tell. He could have had another nightmare and went to the old warehouse to... he did not want to end that sentence. 

Just as he was about to get up Hiyoko added. "Oh he also had a backpack on him. What do you know, maybe he fled the island using the cargo ship?” She shrugged and something in Hajime's brain clicked.

The last time they had talked, Nagito mentioned that he was longing for something unreachable while looking at the ocean.

"Kazuichi do you have the phone we use to contact Makoto on you?" He asked feeling anxious.

"Huh? Yea? But I thought we were looking for Nagito?" He fumbled through his jumpsuits pockets while asking.

"Hiyoko might have a lead... but I’m not sure if I'm just going to warn Makoto just in case." Hajime took the small phone out of Kazuichi’s hand. The others in the dining hall seemed to pick up on what was going on and were talking to each other as in what could have happened to Nagito.

"Would he really just leave the island without telling us?" Mahiru asked as he got to the diner, completely avoiding Hiyoko.

"If he did, it would be dangerous for him. Didn't he just recover?" Peko added in.

"He is also quite weak for a guy his age. If only I offered to train him..." Nekomaru sulked.

" Aah! What if he gets eaten by a _real_ bear! He is reaaaally unlucky ya know!" Ibuki screamed in terror.

"Fool. The general of darkness does not strike its prey unless it is called up upon by the devil of the sins!" Gundham said dramatically, contrary to his words looking somewhat troubled.

"U-um he is actually lucky and knows some self-treatment but...we could never know." Mikan added worriedly.

"If something were to happen to him, we shall help him immediately! It is our duty as his friends after all." Sonia cooed in.

"Huh? Are we gonna beat some people up? Alright I’m in!" Akane yelled with her mouth full of food.

"Stop making so much fucking mess! It's not clear yet so calm down." Fuyuhiko said to Akane who didn't really listen to him.

His friends' loud worry didn't help him as Hajime called Makoto. It rang for some time, each second building up the anxiety bubbling at the bottom of his stomach.

"Future Foundation 14th Division. Makoto Naegi speaking." His calm and professional voice emitted through the phone.

"Hi Makoto, it’s me Hajime." 

"Oh Hajime! Whats up?" His way of speaking changed as soon as he heard Hajime's familiar voice.

"Nagito is missing. And I'm quite sure that he is on the cargo ship that sailed today." He cut to the point immediately.

"W-what? That’s... are you sure? If so it could potentially put you guys in danger. I'm sure Nagito knows that as well... maybe he is around the island somewhere?" Makoto sounded unsure. He wasn't entirely wrong; he could still be on the island but the voice in his head told Hajime that he was on the right track.

"We will search for him on the island but I want you to be on the lookout when the ship arrives. If he is on the ship just like I suspect, then send him back." Hajime inquired as the others gave him a nod and left the diner to search around the island. "Sorry for the trouble. I really don’t know what’s going around in his head..." as he said this he heard a soft sigh from the other.

"Well... thank you for informing me. As for Nagito... I’m sure he has a valid reason. If he really comes here I’ll try to talk to him about it." He said optimistically. 

After saying goodbye to Makoto, Hajime decided to help the others search as well.

-

A full day passed until Makoto called him again to tell him that yes, Nagito did flee the island and no, he didn't stop him. Instead he gave him a mission. By himself. And now they couldn't reach him. Hajime gave another sigh, a headache already forming from not getting a proper sleep for 2 days.

"Can you send another ship at least? I will go and help him and bring him back." Hajime rubbed his forehead. 

"Ah about that... it might take a couple of days because of the Monokuma attack..."

"..."

"Look I know you are worried about him but I think he can take care of himself you know. I... also believe that his talent won’t let him get hurt." Makoto tried to comfort him.

"I'm going to make a small ship and use it to get there." Hajime said almost desperately. 

"Y-you can't! Especially after we get attacked! There would be a lot of suspicion and doubt towards you and it would destroy the trust we build thus far... There is a way to do this and I’m sorry but... you have to wait." After saying his goodbye he closed the phone.

Hajime gritted his teeth. He hated this. He hated feeling useless. He felt like if he didn’t go and get Nagito right now, he would lose him forever. Just like...

He forced the thought away. He needed to think positively. Nagito would be fine. He was smart. He was always one step ahead of him. There is no way something would happen to him. Unless... he himself let it happen... 

"Ugh this is not working! How can Makoto just....be positive?!" He scratched his head with both of his hands.

"Nagito... even after all this time I... I don't understand you..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes i feel like im writing too many unnecessary stuff and need to hold myself back, and then i feel like im not describing stuff good enough... agh!  
> Anyway, we will continue with Nagito's side on the next chapter!


	7. Old And Young Faces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/ Drugs

"..Nngh.." Nagito awoke with an awkward numbness he felt in his whole body. The first thing he noticed was the cold hard floor. And the second was 2 silhouettes talking before him.

".....and tell her that I’m only doing this because she gave us the house and because of Akira, nothing more."

Even though his vision was blurry and the voices sounded muffled he could still tell that it belonged to the old lady. The person she was talking to didn't respond and for a second he thought Nagito and the old lady made eye contact. They seemed to move around a little and then the whole... room?... fell under darkness. It seemed like they closed the door? He couldn't really tell. He was starting to feel a little anxious so he tried to move around but his whole body felt too heavy. They must have drugged him... but why? Did they want to torture him? Aah he really had the worst luck... 

As he was dreading the pain a shocking sound made his whole body tremble. Is that...the sound of an engine? What for? Did they...have a torture machine perhaps? Why would they go to that length for someone like him? Did they have a grudge against him? Ah... did the old lady figure out he was a former remnant of despair and now wanted revenge for her son and husband? Could be. Well if he was going to get punished for the amount of despair he caused when he was servant... he was ok with it. It would be preferable if they didn't kill him though. He still wanted to see the hope that shines brightly-!...

... what... What was the hope that he wanted to see? 

He didn't know...

Well he never knew from the start. That much did not change. He clung onto something so vague...but so real for so long. The only thing that kept him holding onto life.

Hope.

He could only hope.

He didn't have anything.

He didn't have anyone.

His whole life, the only thing he could trust was his messed up luck cycle.

After something bad happened, another good thing equal to it would happen. Eventually.

After something bad happens he could always hope for the good.

Hope that someday, his pathetic life would have a positive impact on something or someone.

So that he wouldn't die a meaningless death.

So that he could be useful.

For that, he hoped.

Because he was weak.

Powerless.

At the mercy of the powers he didn't have control over.

The only thing he had.

Was something as small as hope...

...hope, that kept him alive until now.

And after all of that, was he going to die here now? Is this the place he would give his last breath? He hasn't even reached where he wanted to go, to visit, at least once.

If he was going to die here...why did he feel so empty? Shouldn't he be sad? Shouldn't he be angry? Or glad?

Well he died before... or more like he was comatose but he believed he died. He didn't think he would open his eyes again.

He could have stayed there...

They...could have left him inside the neo world program...

He...could have left him...

But he didn't... 

He even nursed him back to health.

Stayed by his side.

And the others...

They didn't treat him the same. 

Like when they were all just classmates.

When they were in despair.

When they were killing each other.

Some of them were still cautious of him but it was clear they didn't treat him the same.

He didn't really know what to feel about it.

Could he...have been...friends with them? If he tried?

He didn't know.

Well it wouldn't matter if he was going to die here.

As he was slowly falling into despair he felt the whole room shake even more and... move? What?

Oh.

He was in a vehicle.

Well then... what is going on?

He is being sent to somewhere? Ah, so he wasn't going to get killed. 

That's nice.

As he gave a huff of air he realized he was slowly feeling even more numb.

'Ah... I hope this will turn out ok...'

Was the last coherent thought he had before falling asleep again.

.

..

...

"HEY! Who do you think you are touching?!"

" Let us go! You adult perverts!!"

Nagito was startled as the sounds of struggle broke out and an impact on his back forced him awake.

"You will regret this!"

"Oouchh... oh wait...it... doesn't actually hurt?"

"That's because you are sitting on a person..."

As the pain of suddenly getting sat on and being startled awake Nagito could only groan to himself.

He heard the door of the vehicle close again and the loud complaints of the children grew even louder, giving him the start of a headache.

"Come on get off of him..." the person that the voice belonged to pulled the other off of Nagito. "Aw...but I don't want to sit on the ground..." he complained as he finally got away from Nagito.

"H-huh?! Is that-" the girly voice exclaimed as the other turned towards them.

"Servant?!" The tree of them yelled while the other looked around confused.

"Ah...h-hello there..." Nagito tried to greet the former Warriors of Hope, his voice coming out very hoarse.

The four kids immediately scurried to the corner as if they just saw a cockroach.

"H-how?! Why?! Why are you here?!" Masaru came up front, shielding the others.

"Weren't you with Monoca? Are you two behind this?!" Nagisa glared as soon as her name was mentioned.

He needed to clear the misunderstanding but doing that while laying down would be weird so he decided to get up. He tried to use his left hand to lift himself up from the ground... 

but face planted right onto the floor instead.

He groaned in pain."Uuggh.......huh?...." He froze as he looked at his arm.

"What are you... is this supposed to make us feel sorry for you or something?" Kotoko questioned, feeling conflicted and weirded out.

"Huh? Hey look! He doesn't have an arm!" Jataro pointed at him while yelling causing the others to gasp.

He doesn't have his arm.

He doesn't have _his arm._

He doesn't have the arm Hajime gave him.

He doesn't have the arm _Hajime made for him._

He...he took it off before falling asleep. It's probably at the old lady's house.

He needs to...he _has_ to get it back! He can't just...just lose an important gift that was given to him by someone so special ... He can't... 

he has to get it back!

He....has.......to..........

...

Was...was this because of his luck?

...

Then...

Then he...

Then he just needs to accept it...

This kind of misfortune will bring him great luck for sure! 

All he has to do is bear the despair of losing such a precious item and... wait for the luck to come his way.

Just like always...

"What the hell is up with you?! I knew it, you are still the same!" Kotoko said accusingly.

He must have made quite the disgusting face.

"Haha...I am sorry for making all of you uncomfortable. It's hard for trash like me to convince anyone but I can assure you that...I’m not the same as the last time we have seen each other." He sat down, carefully this time, too tired and numb to get up. He offered a smile he assumed was friendly, failing to notice that the former Warriors of Hope were too familiar with the face, therefore did not believe in him whatsoever.

"Monaca _is_ behind this isn't she? What does she even want with us anymore?" Nagisa said with an angry tone.

"Ah I haven't heard from her for quite some time. Actually, I heard she is ...in space? And apparently me pestering her too much actually made her not care about hope and despair at all. I would guess you all knew about this, since you guys were the ones to help Miss Komaru defeat her." He said glancing up at them. Now that he got a good look at them, they had grown since the last time he saw them. They looked beat up too, unfortunately. Clothes disheveled, hairs a mess and bandages that were too clearly applied by mere amateurs.

"H-how do you know that?!" Nagisa asked.

Nagito smiled. "Ah I’m with Future Foundation now, same with my classmates, so gathering information isn't that hard."

"What?! No way! Why would they let a nobody like you in? Aren't they rebuilding the world? How can a servant of despair like you be with them?!" Nagisa pressed on further. 

Ah it seemed like he knew some stuff about them. Maybe he searched if they could join them as well? He could use that. In a situation like this, having people that could potentially help him would be crucial.

"Well I work for them from time to time, as do my friends, so if you guys actually needed something from them...I would gladly help."

This seemed to peak their interest as Nagisa looked troubled.

"Are you telling the truth?" He asked quietly.

"Nagisa?! Are you sure?" Kotoko pulled on his sleeve to get him to look at her.

"If he is telling the truth, we might as well try... I... I don't want to put you guys at danger anymore. Because... I’m not a good enough of a leader that we wound up in this situation..." He said looking at them all.

They all looked like they wanted to cry. Huh... what have they been through to transform from those proud and loud children to...this? He guessed a world full of despair and destruction would be the answer, even if these kids were far from innocent a world like this would surely change a person.

The time he had spent with them and the way they treated him, he forgave all of it. Servant deserved to be treated like that. A pawn of despair. How ridiculous. But he wasn't like that anymore...he hoped.

"How can we trust your word?" Masaru spoke up.

"Hm...it would be easy if I had my bag with me but...I unfortunately lost it. Along with my coat and my arm... I could have shown you the walkie-talkie they gave me but that's far from possible right now. I’m sorry but for now, I just need you guys to trust me." He said apologetically. This did not ease the tension between them so he added.

"I'm pretty sure we are being trafficked right now, so we need to work together to get away from these people... so, when it comes down to it I will help you all escape, even if it means you have to leave me behind. And I could leave you guys to find a way to contact Future Foundation. Giving my name to them should be enough for them to start moving I hope. How about it?" 

The kids didnt reject the idea but didnt give any affirmation either. Nagito decided to just let them think about it. It's not like there was any opportunity to run away right now. He only proposed an idea that might happen, if they are lucky.

Masaru sighed and sat on the ground. "How the hell did you wound up in this anyway?" He asked, holding up his head with his fist on his cheek. "Ahah, I just got really unlucky. Well it is to be expected from trash like me..." he self-deprecating laughed away, trying to not think about his arm.

Kotoko sat down next to Masaru with a thud. "Aaargh I hate this! How could we get captured by useless adults like these?!" Jataro gloomy sat down as well. "I’m hungryyyy...."

Nagisa seemed to relax a little but didn't sit down like the rest of them. "Let's say...that what you say _did_ happen... and we just ran away without saying anything to the Future Foundation. What are you going to do then?" He asked.

Well Nagito had no idea yet so he just shrugged. "Hm well it just means that I will have to find a different way to get away." 

Nagisa looked a little perplexed. "...that’s just stupid" and he sat down as well.

"Ah!" Jataro suddenly yelled.

"W-what? Why did you yell in my ear??" Kotoko said, shielding her left ear.

"Let's say we did um... do what you told us to do and uuuh... talked to a future foundation member... what...what are we even supposed to say?" He asked and it looked like something in Kotoko's brain just clicked as she gave a big gasp.

"We don't know your name?!" She yelled at Nagito.

"Huh? Isn't it just Servant?" Masaru questioned.

Nagito chuckled as he answered. "I suppose I need to re-introduce myself... I am Nagito Komaeda. Former Ultimate Lucky Student and current Future Foundation Member, branch of Division 14." 

"ULTIMATE LUCKY STUDENT?! You are an _Ultimate?!"_ they all yelled in comedic fashion as Nagito laughed, trying to mask the pain of having a headache.

"Liar! There is nothing exceptional about you! No way you got accepted into Hope's Peak!" Nagisa yelled over their confused yet excited shouting.

"Ah well that is true. I am nothing but boring trash... yet I was accepted into Hope's Peak. And because of mere luck no less. Well it doesn't really matter as Hope's Peak is gone now." He said solemnly. He can't say that he was honored to be accepted into Hope's Peak anymore as he used to do.

"Wow... this is so weird..." was the last thing they said as a loud knock came from where the driver's seat should be, telling them to shut the hell up.

"Um ...what are we supposed to do now?" Jataro asked, looking unsure.

"We wait for an opportunity and when the enemy puts their guard down, we strike!" Kotoko whisper-yelled.

"Alright! I'm going to pay them back with %10000 interest with the way they treated us!" Masaru whisper-yelled as well, pumping up his fist.

"We need to make sure we are safe before making any stupid mistakes, so be careful." Nagisa advised calmly.

"Yeaah! Interest!" Jataro yelled- not so quietly.

They bounced back fast it seemed. That was a really good trait to have. As Nagito watched them the car suddenly stopped.

Causing Jataro to yell "AAAH! We are doomed!" Which earned him a smack on the head from Nagisa.

"Be quiet! I hear them talking." Masaru held a finger above his lips as he put his ear to the wall of the car.

"Can you even understand what they are saying?" Kotoko questioned with the smallest hope on her face.

Masaru listened for a minute before speaking. "I can't really tell but I think they are fighting? They sound angry." At this, all of the other kids put their ears next to Masaru's. 

Nagisa stopped leaning on the wall first. "I think they said something like "our zone, orders, give your baggage and remnants?" 

"Wooow you heard all that? All _I_ heard were muffles!" Jataro said excitedly.

"It seems like the people that are transporting us have entered someone else's territory and now they demand whatever is in this truck." Nagito deduced.

"Hmm... but they also said remnants, I'm sure they mean the remnants of despair right? I don't really understand..." as Kotoko finished her sentence they heard a very loud sound like something has been slammed against the vehicle.

"Oh, they stopped talking." Masaru reported.

The silence made everyone grow tense as they waited.

After what seemed like a couple of minutes had passed, they suddenly heard another loud noise, much louder than the last time.

The kids flinched from the very sudden and loud noise as Nagito said “That was a gunshot… we probably shouldn't anger these people if we don't want any unwanted holes in our bodies...” Just as he finished saying that the door of the vehicle slowly opened, revealing a tall person.

“Well now, would you look at that. ‘Just some animals, nothing important’ my ass. You guys are clearly human trafficking. And it's just a bunch of kids as well, hah!” The tall guy laughed until he saw Nagito, right at the back of the truck. He looked a little shocked and when the kids checked Nagito, Nagito looked shocked as well.

“You…”

The guy was tall, taller than Nagito and he was built nicely. He had long dark red hair that was in a ponytail and was wearing a messy suit.

“Are you Nagito?”

‘Aaah...how unlucky… to meet such a bothersome person…’ Nagito thought to himself.

He knew this person unfortunately… He…’spent’ some time with him when he was servant for a couple of days and… one night… At first he hung around him because he was an ultimate. Katashi Gushiken is the Ultimate Gunslinger to be precise. He was a junior to Nagito at Hope’s Peak although they had never met each other at the time because he was expelled due to shooting a classmate. He had made quite the name so he of course had heard about him. The first time they met was when he was servant and things escalated from there… he didn't want anything to do with him anymore but it seemed like lady luck had different plans…

'Ah... I hope this will turn out ok...'

He thought to himself twice that day...


	8. A Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My finals are finally over !  
> Hey teachers! Do i really need to give my soul to satan to pass my classes?? Like come on we are in the middle of a pandemic ;-;

The truck shook as the tall gunslinger hopped into the back. He didn't close the door and moved towards Nagito, not really giving any attention to the frightened children. The outside light making him look like a silhouette. He towered over Nagito as he stood since Nagito was sitting on the ground, his red pony tail swinging slowly as he inspected him.

"How come you look worse than before?" Katashi sneered at him as he slowly crouched to get a better look at his face.

Nagito had to hold himself back from sighing with exhaustion as he avoided his question. "What luck...to see the ultimate gunslinger at a place like this? ...Never took you the type to move in a group." He said as he looked over his shoulder. There were 3 more people in suits... suits that he was familiar with. "Didn't know you were a Kuzuryuu..." he continued as he looked back at Katashi's light brown eyes to find he was looking directly at his neck. 

"Hmm...well this and that happened ya know. “as he finished, one of the guys outside yelled at him. "Stop chatting around Katashi. let's get a move on if you confirmed the luggage."

"Yea yea, let’s go." He got up and jumped off the back of the truck. "We are taking this." He slapped the truck as he looked to the side, presumingly to the guys that kidnapped them.

"W-what?! You can’t! -" their kidnapper yelled.

Katashi moved his hand to his hip, towards his gun." I 'can't' what?" He asked menacingly, shutting up the guy. "That's what I thought. Hop in boys!" He yelled to his.... friends?... as he moved towards the front of the truck while one of the guys closed the door once again.

Just like that the truck roared back to life. Kotoko yelled "What the hell was that?!" Towards a very gloomy Nagito.

"You two know each other right? Does that mean he will help us?" Masaru asked with clear doubtful hope on his face.

"Somehow that.... doesn’t look like it..." Nagisa commented.

Nagito finally gave a sigh, rubbing his temple with his right hand. Yup. A headache had formed.

"Yes we are acquainted with each other but I wouldn't rely on him to get us out of this mess. In fact, it looks like he is taking us into another mess..." he laid his back at the wall.

"Mmm....that's not good..." Jataro said as he scratched his face.

This wasn't good.... wait no... this was lucky!

Yes! Ah how lucky he was! 

His way towards the Kuzuryuu's being blocked and then getting kidnapped after losing his precious items were clearly the despairful bad luck but now it was building up to his good luck! He is getting a free ride towards the destination he wanted to go all along!

...but...was this enough of good luck for losing his arm? He didn't think so. Then that means the good luck was coming his way! he just needed to wait!

"We just need to wait and see what happens." He said as he closed his eyes to rest a little. The kids slumped to the ground as they sighed in defeat.

He unknowingly had fallen asleep as the car's shakes felt like he was in a crib...

. 

.. 

...

Black hair spread around him like a spider's nest.

And he was a moth with a wing he broke himself,

unable to escape in the nest he willingly sat upon.

The red eyes looked at him for one second, and looked away in the next, not caring about him. 

He never cared.

He looked ethereal, with the sun behind him. The sun... he wanted to get closer but he couldn't.

Black hair turned into dark red. 

Brown eyes looked down at him, not moving away, not looking away like the reds. 

But those eyes were seeing a different person not him.

Just as his gray green eyes were looking for the reds.

They were looking at each other, expecting and imagining someone else.

But it was fine like this.

They both needed it.

They both wanted it.

Even if it was for just a night.

They wanted to bask in this.

This embrace.

_This despair._

But the sun was looking at him.

It didn't have any emotion in its light.

And still he felt like he was somehow betraying it

The guilt eating him alive at the spider's nest.

...

..

.

Nagito opened his eyes as he remembered the contents of his dream.

Why did he have to have a dream about that...? he didn't want to remember...

He didn't want to remember the things he did to cause despair, for others and... for himself. But would it be alright for him to forget? Would it be fair to not punish himself for the things he has done?

He didn't know...

"Oh you're awake!"

The loud voice flinched him awake as he suddenly got up, knowing full well who the voice belonged to.

"Would you mind not being as loud as you are? Even someone like me doesn't like to be woken up like this." He dusted his clothes as he looked sharply at Katashi, feeling even more annoyed as he saw his brown eyes looking at him, just like in his dream. Too close for comfort.

He looked away.

"Hm can't help if you have sensitive ears." Katashi said, not really caring.

Nagito noticed the former warriors of hope missing from the truck as the door laid open.

Did they...?

"Where are the kids?" Nagito asked, masking any emotion he might be feeling right now with a blank face.

"The others took them inside, they made quite the ruckus. It took 3 guys to handle them haha!" His laugh echoed in the small truck. "I was just thinking if I should wake you up or if I should drag you there so good thing you woke up. I don't think you will make much of a scene like they did. Or..." he got even closer to Nagito's face, leaving him no space to get back to. "...do I need to restrain you?" He purred, smiling at him while Nagito was clearly frowning. This wouldn't do...

Nagito smiled " No need, trash like me can't imagine disobeying clear orders." 

he wanted to get away... but that wouldn't do at all! His luck had basically carried him here so he couldn't waste this chance. He needed to get as much information as possible and somehow deliver it to the Future Foundation. This is why he came here in the first place .... even if he had other plans as well... it didn't matter. He needed to do this properly.

He pushed himself up as Katashi moved away.

"Hmm... well looks like you didn't change much huh? That’s good to know." He said while jumping off the back of the truck, making it shake a little. After stabilizing himself Nagito climbed down the truck as well noticing the sun was slowly setting and that they were in an abandoned city with some broken down buildings.

"But there are clear differences just like..." Katashi turned towards him and suddenly grabbed his neck, startling Nagito. "...you no longer wear your chain that you refused to take off..." he reached towards his head with his other hand "...you cut your messy hair..." he looked at his left arm " ... and you no longer have your arm that you wouldn't let anyone touch..." he looked at him dead in the eye, cold suspicion washing over him"...something must have changed huh?" 

Ah well...this was uncomfortable... 

what was he trying to do, pressuring him like this, right now? It looked like he was trying to see if he had changed sides?...maybe. He was suspicious of him clearly. He needed to avoid being seen like that...

He held his neck slightly firmer. Nagito tried to react as little as possible while answering him. 

"Well, this and that happened you know?"

The corner of Katashi's mouth moved, giving away his amusement. "Hmm? Is that so?" But he still didn't remove his hand. Seems like he wasn't going to take that as an answer... He didn't know what kind of a position Katashi was in as a member of the Kuzuryuu's but any trust would work to his advantage.

For Katashi though, he knew what Nagito was capable of. He didn't completely know who he was because Servant was a quite secretive person and the most he could get out of him were his outlook on hope & despair -which were quite annoying in his opinion- and well...his name. But even with this little information he knew he was always up to something that could be very dangerous to him so he was extremely suspicious as to why he was here even though it all looked like some weird coincidence.

Nagito suddenly chuckled. "When did you become such a worrisome person Katashi? Is it because perhaps.... you have something or...someone... that you want to protect now? If I remember correctly, you used to not care what happened around you."

As he finished his sentence, Nagito felt the chill air getting cold while looking at Katashi's even colder eyes. 

"I finally found her...You will _not_ get in my way." He growled, squeezing his neck harder. As the air slowly got stuck in his lungs Nagito remembered that he was more talented at pissing people off instead of being friendly with them. 

"Ngah..ah...that's not what I...meant. I can assure you. I ...wouldn't imagine...I could get in the way of ...two lovers who...bring so much...hope... to each other-" He took in a sharp breath as the hand holding his neck relaxed a little. "To even imagine that someone like me got in the way of such hope...is just despairful... I can understand how you feel so...please believe me when I say it's a total coincidence that I am ended up here." He tried to regulate his breathing as his neck was released.

"Hmm...is that so?..." even though the suspicion on Katashi's face didn't drop, he completely let go of Nagito, eyes still fixated on him. His gaze slowly landed on Nagito's thin neck and went back up to his eyes again. Nagito held in his breath as he looked at his brown eyes, the setting sun was behind him, the sunlight not reflecting on his eyes.

" Now that I look at you, you look completely miserable, even so than before. It would be foolish to think you can even do something huh..." he scratched his head as Nagito silently gave a sigh of relief.

As Nagito tore his gaze away to look at the beautiful setting sun and getting full of melancholy feelings, one of the Kuzuryuu men peaked from a nearby building and yelled. "Katashi! We finally locked up the kids! Is the other guy awake? Do you need help carrying him?" He said as he got closer and realized Nagito was up. When the guy came close Nagito started to see if he had anything special but was disappointed to find that he was a boring nobody, well he was working as his captor but still. 

"He won't be any problem; I can lock him up just fine." As soon as Katashi finished his sentence a strong chill wind blew their way. It didn't really affect his captors but since Nagito didn't have his sturdy jacket he gave a visible shiver. He didn't have his jacket, he had short hair and he lost his hand...he felt like he had lost all of his important characteristics...

"Hmm?" Katashi looked at Nagito for a second before his attention was pulled by the other man. "Also Boss is calling you, wants a report. The usual. I will take care of this guy so just go." He signaled for Nagito to walk in front of him. "Sure sure..." Katashi mumbled to himself as he walked away.

While Nagito walked, just as the guy behind him told him to, occasionally shoving him for no reason. Nagito didn't really mind as he knew his position and he also thought someone like him deserved to be treated like this. Might as well observe and get as much information as he could since he was going to be locked up.

Walking the streets of a big violent gang was interesting as he realized that... almost all of them were wearing Monokuma heads. The familiarity of such a scene made him chuckle darkly, earning him another shove from behind.

Ahh...so that was it! They were still using Fuyuhiko and Kazuichis idea. He expected something new since they had been going against the future foundation for such a long time but it should have been obvious that they couldn't do more without Ultimates backing them up. Well they had Katashi so maybe that's why they hadn't perished yet. Future foundation had gotten more and more powerful after they started using the former remnants of despair to their advantage. They had the control of most of the important places, the only one remaining was their current region but it was bound to crumple under future foundations' hopeful and powerful gaze. They had started to normalize the world once again. Even if it was bit by bit.

And he needed to do his part.

So he looked around more.

It seemed like they were getting desperate. There were Monokuma kids and some old people with Monokuma heads. The buildings didn't look completely safe but they weren't messed up like the ones he passed through in his journey. A lot of them had weapons of sorts. Bats, guns and blunt objects like pipes. 

They turned towards him as he passed them. The Monokuma heads slowly turning towards him. Blank. Thoughtless. Only doing what they are told to do.

"Say, why aren't you and the redhead from before not wearing those creepy masks? Is it not mandatory?" Nagito tilted his head behind to look at the guy in the eyes as he questioned, trying to sound as innocent as he could.

"Heh!" The guy sneered at him. "Only the trustworthy ones are allowed freedom like us! If you prove your worth maybe boss will let you." He had a disgusting smile on his face as if he was looking forward to seeing him messed up to prove his 'worth'.

He seemed quite arrogant.

"Boss?" Nagito echoed, still continuing with the same curious tone.

"He is a Kuzuryuu! After that traitor Fuyuhiko left without notice, he took his place and now leads us! And all of us are looking for Fuyuhiko now. That damn brat... I’m going to be the one to break his little neck and play with that silver haired tool!" He snickered, not noticing Nagito's gaze turning cold. 

Nagito didn't mind being bad mouthed but when it came to his...former classmates, it was safe to say he didn't like it. But he smiled at him anyway.

"I hope you reach your goal!"

There was no way someone as unimportant, bland and a hopeless person like him would be able to touch Fuyuhiko or Peko and that realization brushed away his unease.

"Hah i will do it just you see! But you might be dead before you could even see that since you look like a guy only deserving to be used as a meat shield." He gave him an uncomfortable up and down stare. "Ahaha you are right." Nagito looked ahead of him instead.

This guy didn't suspect him at all and it was actually hilarious since he was giving him a lot of information right now. Maybe he should humor him more.

"You must be really trusted since you are not wearing those bear heads." He could feel the guys pride behind him even though he didn't even look back. 

"Hah! That's right!" He let the guy boast about himself as they passed another street full of people with Monokuma heads. Nothing he said stroked Nagito's interest.

"There are a lot of robotic heads... would there even be enough for me and the kids?" He threw a bone at the guy to see if he would bite.

The guy laughed behind him. "Are you sure that's what you should be worried about? Did you think if there isn't enough you would be left to do as you please? Hah! We have a factory that can make them endlessly so give up on that!" He shoved Nagito again but this time held onto his shoulder, stopping him. 

Ah so this is the building. It was quite smaller than what he expected to be trapped in and he couldn't see windows...peculiar. The guy reached towards his collar and pulled out a necklace that had a lot of keys on it. He picked a square shaped one and opened the door. He made a gesture with his head, telling him to go in and Nagito went inside without a word. They reached another door, he could hear whispers on the other side of it. He couldn't see the shape of the key this time due to the dim light and as soon as the door opened he was pushed in strongly inside, falling onto the cold and hard surface.

He heard the door shut and lock as the sounds in the room got louder.

"Ah dammit!! I was too slow!" Masaru yelled as he kicked the door.

"I told you to be ready! Ugh why do you never listen to me!" Kotoko pulled on Masaru's cheeks strongly as he lazily apologized. The other two gathered at Nagito's side, Jataro crouching to get a look at his face. "...You ok?"

Nagito pulled himself up for what felt like the tenth time that day and smiled at Jataro "I am fine, but thank you for your concern." 

"You all saw them right? The Monokuma heads..." Nagisa asked, tone serious as always, ensuring silence in the small room that was illuminated by the setting sun from a window only big enough for a hand to squeeze in.

"Quite ironic, if you think about it." Nagito added after no one spoke.

"No! I refuse to accept this! Are you kidding me!? I refuse to be the one getting controlled by those things! I refuse no matter what!" Masaru yelled while stomping his foot on the ground.

"Yea! I don't want it either!" Jataro yelled as well, copying Masaru's stomps.

"But...what can we do? If they put them on us, then it's game over! I don't know if we can even take them off!" Kotoko held her head with her hands.

"We...we need to calm down first! We can't think rationally if we panic!" Nagisa tried to get their attention and it worked as they slowly calmed down.

"It seems like they will try to see if we are useful enough for them first before putting the Monokuma heads on us...so I think we have some time. I think we should obey whatever they say for the time being and then plan an escape route." Nagito advised.

"What?! I do _not_ want to do anything those adults tell me to do!" Kotoko growled at Nagito, staring daggers at him.

Jataro and Masaru agreed with her while Nagisa looked unsure.

"I... I hate this too. So much. I don't want to be a puppet for adults ever again... We just... we just need to pretend for a little while right? It will be fine. I'm sure of it! We are going to get out of here together and I will make it happen!" 

Nagisa assured them as best as he could. Even though he was in the same situation, even though he didn't know what was going to happen at all, he stood strongly. 

What a hope filling sight! These kids! especially Nagisa, had so much potential! A potential Nagito failed to see in them before! How ignorant of him, to not see people filled with hope right under his nose!

He needed to make sure these kids were safe. People like these were capable of change, unlike him. So he needed them to live. He would gladly be a stepping stone for them if it meant their hope would shine! 

"I have a plan..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagito: I should gain this guy's trust  
> Also Nagito : *Pisses him off*


	9. Boss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! Im sorry for not updating for a long time. Im having major writers block and im trying to push trough it. Im not intending to give up on this fic so bear with me.   
> I wanted to write a long chapter as an apology but its already hard to write so its the usual lenght.

“Let's hear it.” Nagisa sat next to Nagito on the floor, curious to hear what he had to say. The other kids slowly stopped their bickering and joined the two as the light from the quietly setting sun slowly faded away.

“To get out of here, we need a good enough distraction since I assume they all have weapons of some kind. We need to obey their orders for the time being. I think their attention would mostly be on me since Katashi knows who I am and he probably already told the others to keep an eye on me. This will leave the four of you in less pressure, if you all act like you don't know me of course…

⁸I am yet to find a way to distract them but I have a hunch the Monokuma head factory will come in handy.” Nagito stopped to think. The Kuzuryuus used the Monokuma heads to forcibly use and make soldiers out of normal people. So the factory was an important organ for them to exist as a big mafia group. Sometimes numbers mattered more than abilities, quantity over quality. This applied to the world of talented and untalented people. The untalented had the quantity. The talented ones might have the strongest hope, but it would crumble beneath the majority that was the untalented despair. He has seen this at work with the Tragedy of Hope’s Peak…

And sometimes the untalented, most boring and normal people can bring such splendid hope, with a little push of course. Just like how it was with Miss Komaru Naegi.

“So you are planning on distracting them and letting us escape?...” Masaru looked suspiciously at Nagito. It seemed like their conversation at the truck had not convinced him yet.

“Well, let's say that you successfully distracted them and we escaped. What kind of benefit do you even get from this if it's only us that get out?” Kotoko asked.

Saying that he only wanted them to escape because he saw the glimmer of hope shining from them probably wouldn’t work so he decided to make it a somewhat equivalent exchange.

"I want you guys to find a map of this place as well as how many members & weapons they have and successfully deliver that information to Future Foundation for me, since I don't think they would just let me be after I trouble them and cause them to lose some soldiers." Nagito laughed silently as he imagined the exciting scene of chaos and the aftermath.

"We can do that! We might not look like it… but we can be really...snakey…" Jotaro smiled evilly to himself with his pretty face making him not look intimidating at all and rubbed his long sleeves together.

"You mean sneaky…" Nagisa corrected him with a dumbfound face.

Nagito smiled, this time honestly but soon his expression changed as he heard footsteps echo from behind the door. The kids gave a small nod to each other and moved away from him. The footsteps stopped just behind the door and they heard a click, the door no longer locked, opening with a creak.

The first noticeable thing was the tall figure and dark red hair. Katashi looked at them, with eyes that were giving them a warning "no funny business" as he opened the door wider. The kids except Masaru seemed to be a little intimidated as they had a tense look on their faces. Katashi didn't seem to move or talk, his hand still on the door knob as he looked down at them.

Suddenly a head popped out from behind him, peeking through the gap between the door and Katashi's arm.

"Hello! I brought food!" Said the cheerful feminene voice. She nudged Katashi to move, who didn't look happy to let her pass but did so anyway.

The first thing Nagito noticed about the women was how pretty she was. She had bright green eyes and silky white hair. Her smile adoring her mature and beautiful face as she moved towards them with a plate in her hand and some sort of cloth hovering from her arm. Her clothes weren't anything special and she looked about the same height as Nagito. Towering behind her, Katashi looked more intimidating as she got close to them. He didn't even know why she was getting closer. She could have just left the plate and left.

"All of you must be tired. It's so sad that kids got dragged into this… and a disabled person too… so cruel…" She had a sad look on her face as she put the plate in front of the kids. "But don't worry! We will all be family and you won't feel pained anymore! So eat up!" She smiled at the kids and it seemed she was able to relieve the tension from them. She took one bowl and bread from the plate and moved towards Nagito this time. Nagito wondered if it was his imagination or was Katashi glaring daggers at him? 

"Here you go!" She put the food down in front of him and smiled. Nagito looked at the food. It was just a simple soup and bread combo. There wasn't even any water. Well he couldn't complain since that would be rude even if they are his captors. They were nice enough to give them food anyway...well… they wouldn't want them to die, after all they were going to be their soldiers. Nagito was pulled out of his mind as something blocked his vision and he looked up. 

"You must be cold." She nudged him to take the cloth so he did. Using his hand and his stump Nagito tried to see what it was. It was a hoodie. How did she know he would be cold? Did someone…? Nagito instinctively looked at Katashi, who, weird enough, wasn't looking at him. He must have noticed Nagito shiver outside but...why? So that he wouldn't catch an illness and spread it? Most likely.

"Ah I don't deserve such kindness but… I will take it. Thank you." Nagito smiled at her. "Can I know this kind and giving person's name?" Nagito asked politely, making her giggle. "Ruri." She answered and it all clicked into place. "Nagito." He smiled at her, holding out his hand for a shake. Ruri reached but was stopped as Katashi suddenly grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him. "You saw them right? Let’s go now." He said as he pulled her towards the door. "Oh- okay…" she looked back just as he was about to close the door. "There should be a blanket in the room!" The door was shut and locked.

"What a weird person." Masaru commented. "What a _nice_ person! She gave us food! Let’s eat!" Kotoko beamed and started eating the soup and took big bites out of the bread. "Careful! What if it has poison in it?!" Nagisa reached towards her to stop her. 

"I don't think she would put poison in it after treating us like this! Eat Nagisa!" Masaru stuffed the bread in Nagisa's mouth as he gagged. 

"If you force it down like that….it would kill him without needing poison you know?" Jataro flapped his sleeves worriedly.

"Oh whoops!" Masaru stopped as Nagisa coughed and after a moment started eating with them. 

Nagito had been lost in thought and was staring at his food. Ruri…

"That woman... Ruri... looked a lot like Nagito right?" Jataro wondered loudly. 

"What?! She is a pretty woman! How can she look like him??" Masaru questioned with genuine confusion.

"Nah they look like each other. But Ruri has more pretty and long hair. Also her eyes look like emeralds!" Kotoko gleamed as she ate vigorously.

"Their personalities seem similar too...well I’m not sure why but i feel like she is not as nice as she seems." He said but then it looked like he had just remembered Nagito was in the same room as them as he shot a quick glance at him nervously. Nagito didn't really react, just gave him a small smile and continued eating.

Now he understood why Katashi had approached him when he was servant. He was searching for Ruri and after the despair of not finding her, he latched onto anything that looked like her. It was funny, really. But also pathetic, just like him. He shook his head; he didn't want to think about this any longer. It didn't have any use for him right no- wait no. This…this is useful! He could use her to gain some time for the kids to escape! Yes… it's all coming together! Well...not _yet_ but he was close! 

"I trust you all to do your best tomorrow. If things move fast you four can leave tomorrow. If not, we will do it the next day." Nagito said suddenly. 

"It seems like you have a plan ready?" Nagisa asked him curiously.

"Ah… not yet… but if it happens all of you will notice it so don't worry."

"So you are planning on causing a big scene." Kotoko tapped her chin, thinking. "Well, that's bold! But I'm up for it!" She seemed pumped up. The others didn't seem to object so they continued to finish their meal. Almost all of them had been done with their food but Nagisa seemed concerned of some kind. He got up with his bowl in hand and approached Nagito. Without a word he put the bowl of soup in front of him. 

"Huh?..." Nagito was confused as did the other kids. "You're not going to eat?" That didn't explain why he put it in front of Nagito though. "I-I'm giving it to you alright! Just take it!"

"I can't possibly take your food!" Nagito was _really_ confused now.

"We… we starved you before didn't we? We were awful so...just eat it!" Nagisa said as he returned to his previous spot bashfully. The others picked up on this and got up to give Nagito whatever had been left from their bowls. 

"Uh..huh? No. It’s...it’s ok. All of you are growing kids… I… can't take your food." But before he finished his sentence they had already returned to Nagisa's side.

"She said there was a blanket here 7somewhere right? Let's find it. I can't wait to sleep." Masaru said and the others started to look around not even listening to Nagito.

Was this...their way of saying 'I’m sorry’? They didn't need to do this… he deserved to be treated like that… no one should stoop low enough to say sorry to someone like him!

He watched them awkwardly shuffle around the room to find a blanket and took a spoon full of soup.

They didn't need to do this… but for some reason, the soup tasted better and he felt a warm feeling at the bottom of his stomach…

…

..

.

The warm morning light shone directly to his face, waking him up with a strange delight. The kids seemed to be still sleeping without caring about the chilly morning as Nagito gave a slight shiver. Nothing he couldn't manage though. As he was just about to get up, the door to the small room opened after a click. Just like yesterday, the person that was behind the rudely opened door was Katashi. Him and Nagito immediately locked eyes as Katashi entered the room.

"Oh you are awake. Good. Come with me." He gestured to Nagito and turned away, without even looking at the kids.

"Oh my, am I being invited somewhere private?" Nagito cooed as he got up even though he didn't want to. 

"Don't get the wrong idea. I don't need someone like you for that, I have Ruri." Ah so they _were_ together. Katashi huffed at Nagito, giving him a look that yelled 'you are gross'. Nagito tried to chuckle to ease the mood but only managed to give a weak smile with a puff of air. He walked next to Katashi who locked the door after Nagito was out of the way and started walking, he obviously didn't want to walk side by side with him since he picked up his speed, guiding him without any force. 

"Well you shouldn't blame me for thinking like that since I’m obviously being treated differently than those kids." Nagito tried to tease. It was true that he was getting special treatment even if it was so little Nagito wanted to know why. He didn't really know how Katashi would react but not reacting wasn't one of them and it was Katashi's answer unfortunately.

"Boss wants to see you, not the kids." Katashi answered after they left the building. Nagito wanted to go back inside immediately. It was cold even with his new hoodie. It was better than to be without a hoodie but he preferred his old jacket back more than anything at the moment as he refused to listen to his instincts and continued following Katashi. 

And continuing Katashi while trying to provoke him into giving answers turned out to be quite unfruitful as he mostly avoided or straight up didn't answer Nagito. They had reached a big building that stayed intact and was obviously taken care of by the clean and sturdy look of it.

"-that's why hope will win. By staying on this side you are ultimately destined to los-"

"Oh my fucking god just shut the hell _up_!" Katashi suddenly turned and yelled at him, his patience gone.

"Is this where i will have the honor of meeting the new Kuzuryuu boss? How exciting!" Nagito didn't care about Katashi's sudden outburst and went inside the building, leaving behind the cursing red head who was forced to follow him now. 

Nagito wanted to meet this person and see what kind of a mental place they were in, how they saw the world and what they wanted with Nagito. Running a big group wasn't easy after all. It required talent. Even if the group was Fuyuhiko's hand-me-down.

He walked into the big building and was met with a big entrance hall with 2 staircases from the sides leading to the second floor where 2 members without Monokuma heads stood.

'They must be there.' 

Nagito walked up the stairs as he caught the attention of the men who gave him a questioning look and reached towards their respective weapons since a stranger was walking towards them. But they relaxed as they saw Katashi walking behind Nagito, giving him even more of a questioning look as he looked up at them with quiet anger in his eyes. "Hello. I heard the boss had some business with me?" Nagito stopped to ask and smiled as the two men glanced toward each other. Katashi had finally caught up to him and Nagito gave a glance towards the red head when he was suddenly yanked by his collars.

“He has some business with you alright.” The man growled at him, his face disgustingly close as if he had a personal grudge. The other man opened the door and he was pushed inside roughly. He managed to not fall this time and looked ahead. There a group of men and women, some sitting and some standing. But there was one man at the far back, in the middle sitting at a big chair as if he was king. Once Nagito entered the room all of their attention was on him instantly, stares reeking with hostility. Nagito couldn't help but feel anxiety taking over his body causing him to feel excited. He couldn't help it.

‘Ahh please don't let me down, Mister Boss.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliff-hanger-ish end !   
> I would really appriciate it if you guys left some comments! They give me a lot of motivation.


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